CALLING OUT NAMES: The 2008 THANK YOU LIST:Part 1

CALLING OUT NAMES: The 2008 THANK YOU LIST:Part 1


What's up,

As the story goes (for those who are new to the the email list or just don't read my stories), every year at the end of the year, I get highly contemplative. If you happen to know a New Years baby (and I now happen to know 6) or ANY capricorn for that matter, we are very serious, highly reflective people (who are generally miserable and unhappy with our achievements over the course of year, that we'd actually prefer to not celebrate our birthday at all).

In my case, as I'm born on the 1st of January, the end and beginning of the year also represents my next coming of age. A few years back, after going to Cuba and seeing abject poverty, I started to reflect on how ungrateful we all often are, for the things that we have, the people around us and for another day...

With that said, one of my traditions for the last couple of years is the incredibly ridiculous task of thanking everyone that made my year what it was... Often, people send me an email that says something like "you really made my day with your email" or "I loved that party last night and I hope you know we appreciate the hard work". Those little emails - the little "I feel silly saying this and I'm sure you hear it all the time - but I LOVE YOUR EMAILS" - all of those little things, the love that you show when you support not only my efforts but REAL music and real events, I appreciate to the bottom of my heart - and they keep me going.


At the end of the year, I look back on each and every email - every picture taken, my phone text messages and phonebook, and I try my best to thank each and everyone that I know by name... for taking the time to do something that enhanced my life. This email has become a pre-new years tradition where I CALL OUT NAMES... It's in no particular order - although I do go back and sort alphabetically to make sure there aren't duplicates... Often it's one name into the next as I remember someone, I remember her friend, I remember the guy that introduced us, something funny or there may be a group of the same name lumped together as I remember Jon, John, and Jonathon...

Each year, as I sit to write this passage, I reflect on the year gone by - the successes and failures, the joys, the pains, the good and bad. I think of those who have not been as fortunate to make it, and I take time to greater appreciate the gifts of friendship, as well as the little things that have made this life bearable - especially in a year as difficult as 2008.

Where the first day of the year - my birthday - used to be a marker of my relative success, it is now a marker of the LESSONS learnt over the year, new friendships kindled and old re-connected, the laughter, the achievements - as big or small as they may have been.

The ONE, is my most cherished event - my most personal, as it represents ONE degree of separation and an opportunity for me to THANK YOU - the friends and acquaintances, who without knowing, have become a part of my personal story - teaching me, and inspiring me to continue striving to achieve. The THANK YOU EMAIL acts as a PRE-AMBLE TO THE EVENT... for those who can't make it.

I strongly believe in starting the year as I’d like it to continue - surrounded by friends. My birthday party is the rare occasion that I get to see all my friends, old and new. THE ONE brings together everyone from all of my events - Amnesia to Soul Kitchen, Big People Fete to GroovEssentials, ICON to re:connect and all points between.

This year, I refuse to work at the party. I plan to enjoy every moment. More preparation work than ever has been done to ensure that it runs itself - or someone is there to run it - apart from me lol.. I plan to share the night with you, my friends...


This is my formal invitation to you - if I’ve touched you directly or indirectly - through my words, actions or events - or if I’ve been blessed by your support, words or love.

If I missed you, please know that I appreciate the effort that it takes to even smile and be friendly in this cold cold world - many weren't lucky enough to be here with us and so I say

THANK YOU FOR 2008... Part 1 of 2 - this is just the beginning - and if you're still missed after it's all said and done, please realize I'm doing this freestyle from memory and it was that memory - not my heart that forgot (I've always wanted to say that lol).

I appreciate everything that you've done to enhance my life, whether it was a kind word, a smile, an email, some advice, something you taught me, by supporting or attending one of my events, by telling someone about me, or by simply reading or listening to me on the radio.

Gratefully, I remain,



Yours...

Ian Andre Espinet.



THANK YOU.

100 MILES GARIE,
AARON "BUSINESS MAAAAN" HASTINGS,
ADISA
ADRIAN DE PALA,
ADRIAN MCCALLA
ADRIEN KING (GOOD CATCHING UP, DYING TO TASTE THAT COOKING YOU TALK ABOUT),
AFIYA (THX FOR STEPPING UP),
AGILE (THE AC’S STILL BETTER LOL),
AHMAD HAYNES (YOU'RE AMONGST THE FUNNIEST PEOPLE I'VE EVER MET),
AISHA GRANT,
AJAY & LEGACY SOUND,
ALAIN AND ROYETTE,
ALANA MERCURY (IT’S A SMALL WORLD – HE WAS A GREAT MAN)
ALISA LEWIS
AMANDA JOB (HURRY UP AND COME HOME - FORGET IT DA#( IT. I'LL JUST REACH...),
AMANDA L
AMANDA PANDA HENRY,
AMOL
ANDRE PAUL (WHEN’S THE MOVE HOME?)
ANDREA JUPITER,
ANDY COWARD,
ANSON WILLIAMS,
ANTHONY MORRISON
ASHA GIBBS (THX FOR PLAYING COURIER),
ASHA LAPPS,
ASHLEY JOHNSON,
AUDREY DWYER,
AVALON DRAKES,
AVE MAREEAH, NINI RUBY, JANELLE DUNKLEY,
AVION BAPTISTE,
AVRIL + MAYDAY (INSPIRING),
AYANA MCLEAN (DOES THAT PHONE MAKE OUTGOINGS?),
AYANNA CROPPER,
BABA KAHN (YOU'RE STILL THE BEST PARTNER I'VE EVER WORKED WITH)
BANDIT,
BARBARA PETERS,
BARRY & MELISSA,
BERNISHA (23) AKA LEBRON
BEV CRANDON (NICE TALK EARLY IN THE YEAR),
BIG C,
BOACHIE (WHERE YA AT?),
BONES,
BOONAA (MY NUMBER 2 DRAFT PIC - NEXT TO FUTURE THE PRINCE)
BRENDON PRECISE,
BRENTON ALLEYNE (WE NEED TO CATCH UP),
BRENTTON B (THANKS FOR EVERYTHING… IT GETS BETTER – TRUST ME… SILENCE IS THE KEY – LOOSE LIPS SINK SHIPS),
BRIAN MANGUBAT & MRS. ROBYN MANGUBAT (CONGRATS)
BROTHER NOEL
BRYAN B,
BURGHER (NORMAN),
BYRON (THANKS FOR EVERYTHING)
BYRON PANTHER,
CAMILLE CLYNE,
CAPITAL ENTERTAINMENT (YOU DID IT THIS YEAR)
CARL ALLEN,
CARL MITCHELL (THANKS FOR THE GREETINGS ALL THE WAY FROM GUANGZHOU)
CARLA BABBZ (CONGRATS BABES... BIG PEOPLE FI HAVE BIG TINGS (THAT WAS FOR THE ROOTS GIRL IN YOU) & TWIN (YOU'RE A REAL GUY - GOOD MEETING YOU),
CARLEEN BAILEY AND JESSICA MARRS (THANKS FOR SOME OF THE BEST MEMORIES IN T&T),
CARLOS OBEROI (THANKS FOR THE "IF YOU CAN NAME 5 PEOPLE" SPEECH...),
CARLOS PROMO
CAROL ALLEN,
CASPER,
CASSANDRA LINDSAY
CASSANDRA SKEETE,
CHAMBERS (TAKE YOUR DESERVED PLACE... HUMILITY NAH MEK IT IN 2009... SEIZE THE MOMENT AND OWN IT),
CHANTAL KNIGHT, NIGHT NURSE, MOUSEY,
CHANTAL SENECHAL
CHANTELLE KNIGHT
CHARITY KABANGO (THANK YOU FOR DRIVING THE DISTANCE)
CHARLEEN ADJAYE (AKA AUTO-REPLY LOL),
CHARLENE ALLEN (ALWAYS SMILING - THANKS),
CHARLES KABBOUTH, JAMIL, JEFF, YUNG HO, AND THE AND THE STAFF OF INK, KOOLHAUS,GUVERNMENT
CHASE PARSONS,
CHENELLE MCGILL
CHERYL LINTON
CHERYL MORGAN
CHIEF (WE’RE STILL FAMILY… DON’T GET IT TWISTED),
CHOCLAIR,
CHRISTINA FROM WOODBRIDGE (MONOLITH ASSOCIATED? LOL),
CHRISTINA SAN,
CHRISTINE KELLY,
CHRYSSOULA,
CLAYTON JOSEPH (CONGRATS MAN),
CLAYTON MAX,
CLINT MURPHY (THX FOR THE FAVOUR),
CLINTON SPARX,
CONRAD HAMILTON,
CONROY JARVIS
CORWIN,
CORY MITCHELL (HIP HOP),
CRAIG CHUNG,
CRISTOS COX,
CROWN GRAPHICS,
CURT GREENIDGE (GLAD YOU ENJOYED YOUR B-DAY AT SK),
CURTNEY,
CUT CREATOR CREW,
DALIAH PITT,
DAMEON ROYES & THE BIG IT UP FAMILY(YOUR CHARITABLE NATURE, AND YOUR BUSINESS ACUMEN INSPIRE ME... YOU'RE GREAT),
DAN (H-TOWN),
DANE CLARKE (LUNCH THIS YEAR),
DANIELLE KNOX (WE CELEBRATING AGAIN?),
DANNY PRECISE,
DAREN ALI,
DARREN AND COCO,
DARRYL MCFARLENE (AND THE GROWING FAM - CONGRATS)
DAVE & MARSHA MATTHEWS,
DAVE MCTEAGUE (LOOK FOR DOPE SOUL KITCHEN STUFF IN 09),
DAWN GORDON (CONGRATS ON FINDING WHAT YOU NEED),
DEAN D'AGS (TAKE A DAY OFF MAN… EVEN TED DID)
DEE (WESTSIDE - EASTSIDE NAILS LOL),
DEE DEE CRICHTON,
DELILIAH BARKO (WHAT UP SCRAPPY),
D'ENFORCAS,
DENISE AZEEZ (I'M GONNA WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT WITH SOAP LOL),
DENISE CHANG KIT,
DENISE JEREMY (YOU'RE CAPABLE - NO TALK IN 2009 - NIKE TIME),
DENTON MITCHELL (THANKS FOR THE BDAY GREETING)
DEREK JUNES ANDERSON,
DEXTER (LET’S WIN THIS – IT’S TRIBAL KNIGHTS IN 09. DON’T GET IT TWISTED),
DIAMOND ROBINSON (THANKS FOR THE WORDS MAN),
DIAMOND,
DIANA IORFIDA,
DIJA CHANG KIT,
DIRK DIGGLER (SEAN DWYER) LOL
DIRTY DEZ (THANKS FOR THE TALK IN THE POLICE ASSOCIATION PARKING LOT),
DJ HERBERT (HOLLA),
DJ REMEDY,
DOC (CAPRICOOOORNS),
DON B,
DONNA RANKIN AND DEBORAH,
DR JAY (THANK YOU FOR THE LECTURE THAT CHANGED MY LIFE AND OUTLOOK... IT WAS WAY BIGGER THAN BUSINESS… ALWAYS REMEMBER WHAT I TOLD YOU - YOU CAN'T CHANGE WHO YOU ARE, AND YOU NEVER SHOULD. ALTHOUGH IT SEEMS THE BAD GUYS SEEM TO GET FURTHER, THE GOOD GUYS HAVE MY UNDYING LOYALTY... (EVEN WHEN THE SCORPIO IN HIM DOESN'T THINK SO LOL),
DREW DAZZLE (NEW LEAF?),
DRUNKEN CHOIR (AKA THE 1/3RD BLACKBERRY SQUAD - I'LL EXPLAIN LATER LOL),
DUANE BOBBSEMPLE,
DUANE BROWN,
DUANE LOVELACE,
DUSTY LLEWELLYN,
DWAN “SHRINKING” BRANTON,
DWAYNE AND TRACY ASHLEY,,
DWAYNE MORGAN (I'M PROUD OF YOU - YOU'RE INSPIRATIONAL... (BUT DON'T MAKE ME TELL THEM YOU'RE A PRICK LOL),
DWAYNE MATTHEWS, SUSAN, AND THE MATTHEWS FAMILY – THANKS FOR T&T… (DWAYNE – GO INTO THE LIGHT… THE ROAD IS HARD, BUT 1 SUCCESS WILL MAKE IT ALL WORTH IT),
EARL CHARLES (CONGRATS ON YOUR DECISION),
EARL LYONS (WE HAVE TO DO DINNER THIS YEAR… NO EXCUSES),
EDWARD BUNHAI,
ELARON SKEETE (CAN I GET AN INVITE? LOL)
ELISIA JOHNSON (HAVE A GREAT VACAY),
ELKA GRAHAM,
ELTON BALCOMBE,
EMAN (I HAVE INFO FOR YOU… TAKE YOUR PLACE THIS YEAR TOO),
ERIKA REYES,
ERIN GIBBS,
ERIN NOBLE (STILL HAVEN’T QUIT EH?)
ERROL (AND THE LITTLE GUY)
ESSEN CHAVEZ,
EVERETTE AND PETRA
FABIAN WILLS (WE'LL CATCH UP SOON)
FATS,
FAYOLA EDWARDS,
FEEL GOOD ENT,
FIONA BAPTISTE (CAN'T WAIT TO WORK WITH YOU),
FIONA KNIGHT (ANY CANDY THIS YEAR? LOL)
FLASH (WELCOME TO THE CLUB... ITS THE BEST THING EVER),
FLO KING (TOFLO.COM - I KNOW YOU HAD A SUPER TUFF YEAR - LIKE MOST IN OUR CAMP HAVE... BUT YOU HAVE A GREAT (BRASH) HEART, AND YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY, AND THE SUCCESS THAT WILL COME WITH DOING WHAT YOU KNOW YOU CAN),
FUTURE (SOMETIMES WISDOM COMES IN THE STRANGEST FORMS - EAT A LITTLE AND LIVE LONG),
GAIL PHILIPS AND UNTITLED,
GALA AND NADIA (THANKS FOR TAKING CARE OF ME IN T&T),
GARETH B-BOY NORONHA,
GARVIN,
GATES (NIAGARA),
GEOFF AND VANESSA,
GEORGE - SHAKEDOWN (I COULDN'T HAVE MADE IT THROUGH THE LAST YEAR WITHOUT YOU - THANKS SO MUCH)
GEORGETTE CHARLICOMBE,
GEORGETTE POLLACK,
GERALDINE BELLA (WIII!!!!),
GERMAINE CROWN GRAPHICS (STILL MY FAVORITE DESIGNER)
GETTI (YOURE DOPE),
GISELLE BISHOP,
GLENN LEWIS,
GRANT GREENWOOD,
GREG RUSSELL (NICE GUY),
IAN KAMAU (GREAT MEETING YOU IN FEB... AND YOUR DAD TOO - YOU'RE DOPE),
ICE, THE 4 HORSEMEN (ALLANS PATTIES RUN DE TING) AND THE HEBREW HORSEMAN TOO (THANKS FOR THE PEACE ARTICLE),
JACKIE KAYE (CONGRATS ON YOUR SUCCESS),
JACQUI SPENCER & MARSHA MAZZOCATO (A BIG $#*% YOU. WASN’T THAT OUT OF CHARACTER FOR ME? THESE 2 CLOWNS RUINED MY WEEK, AND DIDN’T EVEN HAVE THE COURTESY TO CALL TO SPEAK ABOUT THE VENOMOUS WORDS THAT THEY SPIT. I’VE ACCEPTED EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM I’VE EVER GOTTEN SINCE I STARTED, AND NEVER RESPONDED LIKE THIS. EVER. – BUT THIS INDUSTRY WILL MAKE YOU POLITICALLY CORRECT – BUT WHEN YOU’RE WRONGED, POLITICALLY CORRECT MAKES YOU TWIST AND TURN AT NIGHT… MY MEMORY’S LONG. IN 09’ I HOLD YOU TONGUE FOR NO ONE … IAN)
JAE BLEEZY AND FATIMA (I'M PROUD OF YOU GUYS),
JALANI (GLAD YOU’RE MOVING UP – STILL WANT THOSE JON B. PICS),
JAMAAL MAGLOIRE & THE TORONTO REVELLERS (THANKS FOR THE OPPORTUNITY),
JAMES ALEXANDER (HOW COME I HAVE TO GO TO TRINIDAD TO SEE YOU),
JAMES HOU,
JANAY SIMPS (BOD BREED EH? WAIT AND SEE WHEN YOU MUMA SEE)
JANELLE STEWART,
JANET BRISCO,
JASON ABRAHAM (THANKS FOR THE ART - I'M STILL NOT SURE WHERE IT'S GOING),
JASON PALMA, NAV (*AKA TORONTO'S #1 DJ), EUGENE, DONNA, PLAY DE RECORD FAM
JAY DEVONISH (AND I THOUGHT YOU WERE A THUG ALL THESE YEARS LOL),
JAY MARTIN (LOVE THE COMEDY WORK ETHIC),
JAY-ME WOODS,
JB JONOLO
JEAN PAUL (CONGRATS FUNNY GUY… NO MORE SMOKE FOR YOU THOUGH),
JEANELLE JULIEN (SEE YOU SATURDAY),
JEF (TORONTO-LIME: ONCE AGAIN, MY CHINESE BROTHER, YOU HAVE BEEN ONE OF THE BRIGHT SPOTS IN A YEAR OF DISAPPOINTMENTS SHOWING ME THAT SOME PEOPLE DO INDEED STRIVE FOR HONOUR AND LOYALTY... IF YOU EVER NEED ANYTHING, I HOPE THAT I CAN BE AS GOOD TO YOU AS YOU'VE BEEN TO ME)...
JEFF CUT ABOVE,
JEFF JAM,
JEFF LYON,
JEMENI (THIS YEAR… THE BIOGRAPHY YEARS BEGIN),
JENN JENN,
JENNIFER INNISS (WHEN YOU COMING BACK TO LIVE? I MISS YOUR SMILE),
JENNY JONES,
JEROME SIMON,
JESSE OHTAKE (THX FOR EVERYTHING THIS YEAR - AAAAARGH. I'LL CALL YOU AFTER MY BDAY PARTY)
JESSE WALKER (I’LL GET THERE THIS YEAR… PROMISE. THAT’S MY WORD. AT LEAST ONCE)
JESTER (YOUR GRIND IS AMAZING... TAKE THE NEXT STEP – YOU CAN PICK A HIT – I KNOW YOU CAN MAKE ONE),
JINELLE (SYLENA JOHNSON)
JO ANN D'SOUSA + CAMILLE,
JOANNE LAVOIE,
JOS LIMAS (WHERE YA AT?)
JR. FLO (I'M PROUD TO SAY I WAS THERE IN THE BEGINNING (SORT OF), CAUSE I SEE HOW HUGE THAT PROJECT'S GONNA BE... AND CONGRATS ON NYU TOO),
JR. JAMES,
JR. PALMER (THANKS MAN),
JUELZ (CONGRATS BABES),
JULES BEDEAU (I’M IN FOR ROTI JUDGING IN 09, AS LONG AS IT’S NOT ON CARIBANA SUNDAY),
JULLY BLACK (MY SISTER, MY INSPIRATION, MY AMAZING FRIEND... AND I GET TO BRAG THAT I KNOW SOMEONE FROM E-TALK AND IDOL... AND GREAT ALBUMS AND...),
J-WYSE (EVERYTING IS EVERYTING)
KAI KARI
KAJMERE (THE DEMISE OF DATING IS BI#CHA$$NESS),
KALIFA JONES (I CAN’T SEE YOU… YOU PREGO’S?),
KARDI (THX FOR THE INSPIRATION... LETS PARTY TONIGHT),
KAREEMA BECKLES (I STILL HAVE THAT MUFFIN PAN),
KAREN BISHOP (AND MY LITTLE FRIEND LMAO - I HAVE A SNAKE YOU KNOW) & JANAY,
KAREN GRANT,
KAREN MEWA & FAM (WHEN’S THE NEXT OAKVILLE VISIT?),
KAREN RICHARDSON (THE BLACK HISTORY MOMENT WILL RETURN - THX FOR THE WORDS)
KARLA MCRAE,
KARLON MAGLOIRE,
KEICHA MCLEAN (MISS YOU… WHERE YOU BEEN?),
KEISHA LATA (I STILL CAN'T SPELL IT ALL LOL),
KEITH GULSTON AND THE CUT CREATOR FAM,
KELLY-ANN JONES,
KENYATTA,
KERENSA (HEY HUN – YOU DON’T LOVE ME ANYMORE?),
KERWIN ADAMS (THANKS FOR BEING A HUGE INSPIRATION THIS YEAR WITH YOUR FEARLESSNESS - DON'T GET ME WRONG - SOMETIMES AN OFF SWITCH FOR YOUR TEMPER MAY COME IN HANDY LOL),
KERWIN DUBOIS,
KESHIA GRAY,
KEVIN DIGITAL PHOENIX (THANKS FOR THE GREAT, PROMPT WORK)
KEVIN MOSELEY & THE WRESTLER CREW,
KEVIN PRESCOTT,
KHADISHA THORNHILL,
KHARY GIBBS (THX SOOOO MUCH... THAT'S HISTORY),
KID C,
KID KUT (THE #1 PAIN IN THE GAME),
KIM DAVIS, AYAH,
KIM TULL (THIS YEAR - CALL FOR DETAILS LOL)
KIMANI LEWIS (YOU MOVED UP THE 34 THIS YEAR LOL – WHAT NUMBER? CAN’T TELL YOU),
KIWANNA
KLC,
KRISTY BURLI, ANGIE ISAACS AND THE BURLI CREW (THANKS FOR THE GENEROUSITY AND THE LIFTING),
KWAME & JANELLE HILLS,
LADIES AND MEN AND WUK,
LAKEISHA (YOURE A SWEETHEART... GLAD TO KNOW YOU),
LATOYA ALS (ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME? LOL),
LAURA MAGNOLI (I THINK IT’S THE SPORTS… NOT THE MARKETING OF SPORTS),
LEA “FOOD DRIVE” PASILABBAN,
LEIGHTON JONES,
LEIGHTON WALSH
LENNOX LIVERPOOL, EUGENE & 6 DEGREES,
LEONA ATKINS (THANKS FOR TEACHING ME ABOUT GM - AND DRIVING FAR FAR FAR - I KNOW YOU HEAR ME STAR),
LESLIE GRANT (GET A DRESS?) & SHARON,
LESLIE RAYMOND,
LETRICIA MCNICOLLS,
LINCOLN BLADES (CELEBRATING CAPRICORN?),
LINDO P (JUST ONE HIT AWAY – SEE YOU ON MY BIRTHSTRONG LOL),
LINDSAY JUPITER,
LISA JONES (YOU AND R.B. ARE CUTE)
LISA SHAH,
LISA WALKER (CHALLENGES? WOW... CONGRATS)
LISSA MONET,
LIZA AMLANI,
LOLA,
LUTHER BROWN AND WAYNE (SO PROUD OF YOU MY BROTHERS... YOU GOT IT IN THIS YEAR)
LYRIC GYLES,
MANSA (I THINK I GOT YOU, BUT, YOU'RE MY GIRL)
MAR B (SOUVS),
MARA JEFFREY (SOUL KITCHEN)
MARABAI (MIRA MIRA?)
MARIA LONGAGNANI (GOOD REUNITING)
MARIE COLLINS,
MARK 2PHATT,
MARK MIGNOTTE (YOU CAN DO… THEY CAN HELP – BEST LINE OF THE YEAR),
MARSHA AND MONIQUE MORRIS (YES I SHOULD HAVE PUT YOU SEPARATELY)
MARSHA MATTHEWS,
MARSHA WILLIAMS,
MARXMAN,
MAX GREENE,
MEGGY (GO FOR IT),
MEL BOOGIE (WHEN WE CATCHING UP SO YOU CAN TELL ME THAT STORY…),,
MELANIE BIRZE (YOU CHANGED MY LIFE BY MAKING ME UNDERSTAND STRENGTH),
MELANIE LONGBOAT (TEAM AMNESIA?!?! THAT'S DOPE)
MICHAEL AND SEAN CHATRATH,
MICHAEL COOMBS,
MICHELLE CHEONG & NICOLE MCFARLENE,
MICHELLE COWAN, NEELY MOSCA,
MICHELLE GRANT,
MICHELLE REYES (PROUD OF YOU… 08’S OVER… AND NOW IT BEGINS),
MIKE JANSEN (LUNCH BEFORE YOU GO?)
MIKE MALCOLM,
MIKE MANAGO,
MIKE SAMLALSINGH,
MIKE Z, CLICK AND SYN,
MIKEY JENSEN (LUNCH IN 09... MY FAULT),
MIKYLA,
MINESH (YOU CAME HOME AND I NEVER CAN TO VANCITY)
MISHA AND SASHA,
MITZI BOGLE (LOVE YOUR ENERGY - HOW COME I DIDN'T NOTICE IT THE FIRST TIME I MET YOU LOL),
MOIS AND THE STAFF OF LEVEL, BLURR, SUITE, WETBAR AND BLVD,
MONA LADY LUCK
MONIQUE TAYLOR (OR WHATEVER YOUR SASHA FIERCE NAME IS),
MONIQUE WINDSOR,
MRS. ROSTEING (I OWE YOU SOME CONDENSED MILK… LOVE YOU LOTS),
MS. JOHNSON (CONGRATS - I'LL BE WATCHING KINK)
MUSTAFA AND CREW,
MYANA (HEY SIS),
NADIA & RAYMOND,
NADIA BATSON (I’M CALLING… SORRY – IT GOT CRAZY. CONGRATS ON THE STORE AND HAPPY BELATED BABES),
NADJA BABB (I LOVE THE GROWTH... GO FOR IT ON THE PHOTOG FRONT),
NAOMI JEREMY (SORRY I COULDN'T EAT THE CAKE),
NATALIE ELLIS, NATASHA ELLIS, TEREENA AND INTRODUCING (THE NEW LY NICKNAMED) SMILEY (CONGRATS),
NATALIE PHILLIPS AND COOKIE
NATASHA AND KESTER (CONGRATS... BLUEPRINT FOR LOVE)
NATASHA CAESAR (WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR EARLY YEAR CALLS?),
NATASHA JOHNSON (IF I WAS… I WOULD HAVE LOL)
NAUGHTY BY NATURE, TREACH, VINNY, JEFF AND THE COMPANY,
NAUGHTY V,
NAVIN AND THE RENEGADE SQUAD, FABIAN WILLS (GREAT CATCHING UP),
NEDDY NYCE,
NEEKS $,
NEELY-ANN AND MICHELLE,
NGARDY CONTEH (WHEN WE DOING THAT INTERVIEW?)
NICHOLAS BARHAM (REMEMBER WHAT I TOLD YOU - IF YOU EVER NEED GUIDANCE),
NICOLAS CHAI,
NICOLE 11TH HOUR
NICOLE ALEXANDER,
NICOLE ALI (WHERE'S MY CAMEO IN THE MAGIC BULLET COMMERCIAL?),
NICOLE BARHAM,
NICOLE CRICHTON,
NICOLE LLOYD (IS IT HERE YET?)
NICOLE MULAN (416.425.)
NICOLE PIERRE
NIRVANA SAVOURY,
NOVA (CONGRATS ON YOUR MOVE),
NUNU (WHERE ARE YOU?)
NURSE KAREN AND JD JOHNSON (LOVED THE LIME IN T&T),
ODESSA AUSTIN (LOVE YOU GIRL - AND I KNOW I OWE YOU A CALL - HAPPY BELATED),
PATICE (MISS THE CONVOS)
PATRICIA JUGGERNAUTH (WHERE'S THAT INTERVIEW I DID AT STYLUS?),
PATRICK LEWIS (THAT'S THE MOST EXPENSIVE FRIENDSHIP EVER.. BUT WORTH IT. I THINK LOL),
PATRICK SPARKS (MUSIC MAN)
PATTI JAY,
PELORI (FORMERLY OF CUT CREATOR),
PERRY,
PETRA JEFFERS (YOU ALREADY KNOW - YOUR TEXT MESSAGE RIGHT BACK ATCHA),
PETTAH SPARXX (NO CONSULTING FEES SEE?),
PETULA,
PHIL VASSELL (THIS YEAR?),
PLAY DE RECORD - EUGENE + DOOOONNNNNAA + NAV + JASON,
PLAYHOUSE,
POW POW (I MISS YOU LIKE MAD... IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT PARTIES YOU KNOW),
P-PLUS (UNDERGROUND… FORGET IT. LOL),
PRESTO,
PRISCILLA BARKS (THANKS FOR BEING A PART OF MY YEAR),
PUNJI (CAN'T LEAVE PROMO ALONE… THE GAME NEEDS ME LMAO)
RACHE M (STILL WISH I WAS A LITTLE BIT TALLER)
RAHIM ULTIMATE,
RAISHA (LOVE YOU... AND THANKS FOR THAT FAVOUR - ALWAYS),
RAMONA ALLY,
RAWLE AGARD (PROUD OF YOU MAN),
RAYMAC,
RED ROSE (CLUE?)
REDDY FOX,
REG ALBINO (EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON - TAKE THE OPPORTUNITY),
REGGAESUTRA (MARRIED FOR 16 YEARS? REALLY?)
RENEE RAWLINS,
RENELL (ALWAYS REMEMBER - THE CHOICE IS YOURS TO BE THE BEST THAT YOU CAN BE TO BE EVERYTHING THAT'S MISSING...),
RICARDO JONES (THANKS FOR ALWAYS COMING WHEN I CALL),
RICARDO MCRAE (I WANT TO HAVE THIS MUCH FUN IN LIFE)
RICHARD ANTHONY (HOLLA... I NEED SOME WORK DONE AROUND HERE),
RISHI (I'M SO PROUD OF YOU DR. NARINE - FROM SWEET PARADISE TO SCARBOROUGH TO ARMOURY TO MED SCHOOL, THE CEREMONY IN ARUBA, AND A MILL AND A DOT IN THE OAK? - YOU'RE MY HERO),
ROCHESTER JUICE, STERLING, MEDHIK, AND JAYVON,
RODEO,
RODNEY AODAN (ROCKIT),
ROMEO (NUFF SAID)
ROMERO (MONTREAL)
RONNIE ROBINSON (THANKS FOR THAT PIECE OF HISTORY.. AND JUST FOR BEING A GREAT AND PATIENT FRIEND),
ROSE,
ROXANNE,
RUSSELL PETERS (I KNOW RUSSELL… I REALLY DO. LOL),
RYAN BABBZ,
RYAN GODDARD,
RYAN LOWE,
RYAN PINTO (MAYBE WE’RE ALL NOT SPEAKING THE RIGHT LANGUAGE – BELIEVE IN HIM),
SABRINA HEADLEY,
SANDRICE,
SARAH SHARPE (I’M A TERRIBLE FRIEND EH?),
SASHA AND MICHA,
SASHA HALL AND ASABI (LOVE YOU GUYS),
SAUCY (CJ MERCON)
SEAN SAX,
SHADOW,
SHALISE G,
SHALON JEFFERS
SHANAH PITT (AKA SOUL KITCHEN DAUGHTER… LOL. JES TOLD ME YOUR DAD COLLECTED THE SOUL SELECTIONS – I’LL HAVE TO WORK HARDER KNOWING THAT),
SHANE STERLING, ROCHESTER JUICE, JAHVON, & THE FOUNDATION FAM
SHANETTE (SORRY I DIDN'T CALL BACK THAT DAY... THANKS SO MUCH FOR CALLING EVEN WHEN I DON'T),
SHANI LEATHAM (I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU – ASK KIM)
SHANNAE INGLETON IS THE OTHER 2008 WHAT MEN WANT (MICHELLE OBAMA IS THE OTHER) LOL,
SHANNON ALVARES (NO ALCOHOL FOR YOU IN 09),
SHARON AARON AND THE B-GIRLS,
SHARON JOHNSON (AMNESIA LOVES YOU TOO)
SHAUN BABY WARNER,
SHAW HARPER,
SHAWNA GRIFFIN,
SHELDON HINDS (CONGRATS),
SHENNEL,
SHERYL CHYNNA BROWN,
SHIKERIAH
SIMONE, TISHA, LEE-ANNE
SINGLEFOOT,
SKINNY AND ISLANDSOUNDS FAM,
SLAMMER CUTTER + FARM P,
SPECIAL ED,
SPEX (DE BOSS WITH THE POLITE BABES),
STACY Q BLOGGER LOL,
STASIA OSBOURNE,
STEFANY A. SMOCZYK,
STEPHANI ALICIA (SHORT MAN CAN GET IT... STILL LMAO - THANKS FOR THE SMILES),
STEPHANIE
STEPHEN CHARLES – YOU’RE THE MOST EXTRA PERSON EVER… I CAN’T BELIEVE WE’RE FRIENDS – BUT I APPRECIATE YOU… STUPID.,
STEPHEN CLEMENT,
STEPHEN CONDUCTOR,
STEVE ALEXANDER (KEEP YOUR HEAD UP - I'LL ALWAYS BE HERE),
STRETCH DE REAL TING,
STUDLEY... IS ANYONE REALLY NAMED STUDLEY?,
SUSAN AUSTIN (THX FOR THE KIND WORDS),
SUSPENCE,
SUZAN BARRETT (NICE MEETING YOU IN T&T),
SUZANNE JOHNSON
SUZETTE JEFFERS,
SUZETTE RAMCHARRAN (LONG TIME)
SWAINE,
SWEETS WATSON,
SYN (THANKS)
TABOO,
TAMARA ALLEYNE-GITTENS (HISTORY),
TAMARA MALONE (HAPPY BDAY),
TAMAYA DAVIS AND THE TTC CREW,
TAMLA MATTHEWS (WE NEED TO HANG MORE... THE CONVO'S ARE GREAT... MY HOUSE IN 09?),
TAMPOYA (FORSAKEN ME? – NOTHINGS CHANGED IN 08 LOL)
TANESHA JONES,
TANIKA JONES,
TANYA SHORTY JONES,
TANYA SMITH,
TARA MULDOON (FASHIONABLY LATE LOL),
TARVIA,
TASHA LOVE,
TASHA ROSEZ,
TASLIM AMLANI,
TASLIM THE 4 FOOTER
TAT-EM A-IS-H-IA PRINCE (I GUESSED)
TAUREAN,
TECHNIQUE THE KINGPIN FROM VANCOUVER (LOL),
TEINEISHA RICHARDS (MODEL)
THANE & TRIXIE,
THE 34 (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE)
THE ARUBA CREW (HANCE CLARKE (THX FOR THE WISDOM IN ARUBA), WAYNE, BO),
THE ORIGINAL JON JAY,
THE RATTRAY (LOVELACE, PINNOCK) CLAN,
THE STAFF OF THE SOUND ACADEMY,
THEA & MR. JACKSON,
THOMAS NASTYHABITS (GOOD LUCK OUT THERE),
TIFA,
TIFFANY COOMBS (GOOD SEEING YOU - WHAT WAS IT? 15 YRS?),
TISHA
TISHA HAMID,
TONA,
TONE,
TONEY WILLIAMS,
TORSHA CORNIE,
TOYA ALEXIS,
TOYA,
TRACY BURKE + TARA JOHN,
TRACY WILLIAMS,
TRAVIS ANDERSON (SO YOU GOTTA BE SHOWING OFF THE MUSCLES EVERYWHERE EH? THAT'S WHAT'S GOOD?)
TREV FERNANDEZ & THE TRINI KOCH CREW LOL (THX),
TREY NIX (THX FOR TREATING MY ISH LIKE ITS YOUR OWN... I HOPE I RECIPROCATED...),
TRICIA GRIFFIN,
TRICIA KANHAI (YOU DON'T WANT IT WITH MY ROGER RABBIT... DANCE OFF?)
TRICIA WALKER,
TRINITY CHRIS,
TRIXX,
ULPIA,
UNCLE B (THX FOR THE GUIDANCE),
VANESSA + FELICIA DAISY (THX FOR BEING GOOD TO MY DAD),
VERO,
VIC CRYSTAL VIBEZ,
WALSHY FIRE, WILLY CHIN & BLACK CHINEY,
WAN LUV (I'M PROUD OF YOU LITTLE BRO),
WAYNE GREENAWAY (THE DON),
WAYNE MY SOON TO BE LAWYER LEWIS,
WAYNE WARNER (THE OTHER BLACK REPUBLICAN {I USED TO THINK RAPPING AT 38 WAS ILL, BUT LAST YEAR ALONE YOU GROSSED 38 MILL', I KNOW YOU AIN'T QUITE 38 STILL, BUT THE FLOW SO (SPECIAL) GOT A (38) FEEL} – GETTING BETTER WITH TIME LIKE OPUS 1 - THANKS FOR THE INSPIRATION),
WEAZY HARDKNOCKS,
WENDY JOHN (T&T AGAIN?),
WHITEGOLD (CAN’T WAIT TO SEE THE GAME PLAN),
WRISTPECT (BRIDGING THE GAP WAS ONE OF THE MIXTAPES OF THE YEAR)
XXX GREG (I REALLY THOUGHT THAT WAS YOUR BABY)
YELLOW "EARLY MAWNIN" BLACKMOON,
YULANDA JULIEN (I'm calling back jus now... jus now...)
YVONNE KAI,
ZAUHER
ZEETA,
ZEPHRAH

November 4th 2008

What's up?

Sigh. That's what I just did.

I'm not sure how to write this - but if there was a phrase to describe my emotions last night, the one "waiting to exhale" would probably do it. Partially. As about a hundred of us sat at Islandmix, me darting back and forth speaking to different people with understanding of the US election process (California's worth 51... but if he wins Florida, it's mathematically impossible to...), and repeating what I learnt elsewhere, I was waiting - to exhale. I was anxious - sick, happy, excited, in awe of what I was seeing, in disbelief, scared, giddy, longing, confident, sceptic - and volatile. Meaning, I knew that I was going to cry, I just didn't know when.

Last night, as I got home at minutes to 11 (yes... I left early to take my little one home), CNN called it. And just like that, it was over. On came the tears. I haven't cried in ages, although I must admit I've had a couple in the last couple years after a 10 year streak. [Sidebar: watching your parents friends and your own pass away, and your relationships/friendships of long time disintegrate will do that to you...]. I knew that it was going to happen, as earlier, while explaining separate schools, drinking fountains, people being hosed and bitten by dogs, sit-ins, marches and Rosa Parks to my daughter, I repeated the text that I had gotten a thousand times that day - Rosa sat so Martin could walk... Martin walked so that Obama could run... and Obama is running so that our children can FLY. And on came the tears... She was like "are you ok daddy?". I told her that they were tears of JOY.

In conversations, I reiterated that it didn't MATTER whether Barack won or lost - that the impact of what he had - HAS done for the way that we see ourselves, that others see us, and most importantly the way that our children perceive themselves, was already done. BUT. It WAS important that he won. Mignotte argued that the impact of losing would from many standpoints, put Black people and the entire United States back 20 years. First, we may have acted irrationally and further perpetuated stereotypes - worse yet, the emotion created from the loss - if felt cheated, could have created a race divide of catastrophic proportions.

What I realized later, as the Black commentator on CNN summarized my thoughts was this - "for years we've told our children that they can be ANYTHING that they want to be - sercretly knowing that we were lying... knowing that there were things that they COULDN'T be". This was no longer the case... And excellence is something that one does by example, and so Obama can single handedly reverse many of the stereotypes and assumptions by simply BEING... not by being BLACK, but by being excellent and happening to BE Black.

Coincidentally, had he lost, it would have been a statement as well - WHY bother being the best, if the best means nothing if you're Black. It would have been a restatement of the frustration of being the best, but being "overqualified" or "not suited to the job" or "not exactly what we were looking for". But that's not the case this November 5th. The United States picked - whether you agree with his politics or not - the person that was SELECTED, and he happened to be Black and in spite of the fact that he is Black. And his success is a universal success - little girls can be President... and people of all races, creeds, religions can be ANYTHING. If you're the best. The United States should be proud as they have not just a President that is an African American - but the BEST person for the job from . They should also be proud that they were able to have a competition - a hard fought competition - where the clash of ideas and the winner is chosen, and the winner was ACTUALLY chosen. And I'm happy that, although I thought he was on track to win, that I was WRONG about what I secretly thought of the US -

Barack Obama IS THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. And the culmination or all of our dreams. As I watched CNN, my phone rang off the hook - Rishi... Amanda from Japan... Dwayne Morgan... and countless others - Future blackberry pinned me from Times Square - and described it best. "I feel like I'm in a dream. This is surreal". Unreal. Ro said this morning, "I'm driving to work and the leaves are dropping in slow mo... I feel like I'm talking like a one year old - I don't have the words to describe the words I'm feeling. It still hasn't sunk in properly".

I don't think it has for any of us...

I'm inspired... I'm inspired to do more. To return to my spot on Worldwide with the Black history moment - which I reiterate is OUR collective history - which I do as much for Black children and adults, as I do for White, Chinese, Indian, etc - because from understanding comes change. As I've also said at the beginning of that segment, history is a continuum - and we are as much a PART of history as those making it... It's not just the past. It's the present and what it means to our future as well.

Not to compare or belittle what I would say was the single most significant historical moment of MY life thus far, I'd like to take a moment to speak on a couple of pieces of HISTORY that are being made right now that - like what happened last night - I don't think people are personally understanding the significance of.

This past weekend, I attended Soca or Die, Dr. Jay de Soca Prince's birthday celebration and again was awed by the fact that World's Number One soca DJ lives in our city. And that the world's most passionate soca SCENE is ours. We play and listen to more soca, have more fetes and concerts than ANYWHERE it seems. Saturday gone, 6 artists representing the best of the Caribbean touched down on the stage - as chosen by the people in this city in a vote. I think as much time as we spend complaining about the things that we DON'T have in this city, we have to take a moment to celebrate the incredible things that we DO have... Happy birthday Jay - and thanks for being a part of the living history of this city.

The second example of living history takes place this Saturday and pertains to my partner and friend, DJ Starting from Scratch. I'm not sure if you've heard, but Scratch is the OFFICIAL TOUR DJ FOR USHER RAYMOND. Although I'll admit that Scratch's humility is a part of the reason that no one else thinks that it's that big of a deal, let me stop and take a second to explain why it is.

Usher is one of the BIGGEST artists of OUR time period. A couple months back, I argued that Bobby Brown was a King of R&B... and that the other heirs to that title were R. Kelly, Usher, and some day - Chris Brown. He has sold 35 million albums worldwide, and won 5 Grammy's. He is a member of Billboard magazine's All Time Hot 100 artists, and is one of the FEW artists of our time mentioned there - not to mention Urban.

And Scratch is his DJ. And not simply playing opening and closing music dj - part of the show, going back and forth with Usher competing with him. This is one of the most significant things to happen to a Toronto DJ - and competes with A-Trak becoming Kanye's dj - for an Urban DJ. Usher comes to town this Saturday at Koolhaus, and Scratch will be on stage doing what he's done for us for years - and making us proud.

This Saturday at Solarium, we're celebrating this man's life - his birthday... the information is listed below so that you can come down and show your appreciation for someone that has put on for his city time after time... Happy birthday Scratch - and thank you for being a part of the living history of this city...

Finally, around 12 years ago, a friend of mine, Kevin Blagrove introduced me to a guy that has been a constant inspiration for me. His name is Dwayne Morgan and he is one of the people that I go to when I need inspiration as he seems forever inspired. 15 years ago, he produced his first events - and as the story goes, one of them was in the basement of small gym over here at Kennedy and 401. They moved the weights and Black Love took place.

Shortly thereafter, I would have the honour of designing for him for 10 years - Black Love... When Brothers Speak... When Sisters Speak... This Ain't Love Jones... Making of a Man... Edutainment... Strictly Roots... Roots and Relaxation... The Roots Lounge... Last One Standing... Yin and Yang... The Toronto International Poetry Slam... Soul Sessions... 5 books... 5 cds... countless awards. Next Friday and Saturday, he will release his 15 YEAR Anniversary DVD - wow... as I type 15 years I shake my head - the amount of work that this guy has done, further inspires me to do more... It's not your birthday, although it is "When Brother's Speak's" 10 Year Anniversary - but Dwayne Morgan, THANK YOU for being a part of the living history of Toronto...

And thank you to the 3 of you for the part that you've individually played in my personal success with Black Star and the Entertainment company.

Although there are far too many Scorpios, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JULLY BLACK - another source of inspiration for me, and YET another example of the living history makers in our great city. And although someone will undoubtedly wonder why I spent half of my email talking about these people, like Kanye said, "If you admire someone you should go ahead and tell em, people never get the flowers while they can still smell em"... These 4 and countless others are a part of our unique and INCREDIBLE Toronto history...

Thank you for reading and being a part of mine.

Yours sincerely,

IAN ANDRE ESPINET


ian andre espinet
ian andre espinet entertainment +
black star graphic design & communications
canada's leading urban graphic design studio. period.
ian andre espinet 2007

I'm going to hell...

So, I just saw this on the afmlife blog, but I laughed so hard, I HAD to repost it. All now the tears are running down my face. I'm going to hell.

I've fallen and I can't get up.

I

The adventures of Ian the non-bus taker on the TTC...

I'm in a good mood though as I reminisce on the funnier moments of my week.

Picture this. Driver who hasn't taken the bus in years. His car engine goes and he's forced to do so - but is as foreign to buses and their routes as he is to dating. [I think that's one for the blog too eh?]. Anyway, I got another car, but had a little accident involving some of the Allen's apple juice that was on sale at Walmart for $.60 each (have I told you how much I love the Walmart anniversary sale?). So anyway, I drop my car to this amazing detailing place - but he's so swamped that I have to do it first thing in the morning. I drop the car at 7am, and walk out to Kennedy Road. As I'm walking up the road, I look back and here comes the bus. So I do what any logical person would do. I start running. With the memory in my mind of Grace ("bus drivers will wait for you but people have a tendancy to stop running when we wait - so I drive off"), I run - all the way to the bus stop. As I reach the buses doors, weezing like Lil Wayne, he does the unthinkable. And CLOSES the doors. I could SWEAR the person in the handicapped seat laughed at me. As I stand there, cussing, with my hands on my knees (I'm not Usain Bolt - it's been at least 6 years since I did a 100 metre dash - against Skimpy in the tennis court by my house - remember that story? see the p.s.), I glance up with the intention of taking his bus number then just forget it. I decide to WALK to Sheppard. Keep in mind, that was Ellesmere.

As I approach Progress, I look back and see another bus. The stop is within a distance that I can outrun the bus, so I do. I wait there and it stops. I jump on, and ask the bus driver, how much. "$2.75". But I have no change. And they don't make any. Exhausted, damp from sweat, and cold from the temperature, I push in $5 and walk to the back of the bus. What? I didn't have any change.

Doesn't the bus TURN THE CORNER onto Progress going to Town Centre? I ring the bell - and these new buses won't let you ring it continuously - so he doesn't stop until another block. I jump off the bus, again cussing. Now I have to walk ALL the way back to Kennedy and I'm still not any closer to Sheppard. No more bus rides today. I'm walking the rest of the way.

Hope you got a laugh. I think it would be pretty hilarious following me around with a camera for a day

Slacking off...

So. I've been terrible at blogging. I'm going to work on it.

I swear.

I

Zune Zoon Zune (sing it... it'll make more sense)

So... as I said, I've been terrible with my blog of late. I've been parenting *(see upcoming "every citizen needs to shake a kid - it's our our only hope for the future" blog), throwing a massive number of events (although I wanted to reduce the number to 30 this year, I'm already above that in early Oct), catching up with old friends, and trying (unsuccessfully) to eat more healthily - if that's a word. My car's head gasket went (whatever that means), and I had a streak of bad luck and funny instances like the adventures of Ian the non-bus taker on the TTC...

One of the main reasons that I haven't been on this toy is because, like a 3 year old, when presented with a new toy, the old toy seems to go by the wayside. When that new toy is a member of a toy family that, when coming together like Voltron, creates an even more fabulous toy - well, to be frank, the blog gets neglected for weeks. Okay... maybe a month.

My new toy is called a Microsoft Zune, and it goes with my other new toys, the Blackberry Worldphone (that I talked about in my first ever blog) and a car with Bluetooth and MP3 capabilities. See where the problem comes in? I'm not even sure you should be able to do that many things at once - answer your phone with the car, listen to the music, drive and eat an Angus Burger with cheese (from Harvey's - my new craving of the moment... you'd think I'm pregnant).

I digress... Although I'm not a super Microsoft fan, the Zune is an amazing little toy - I'd expect no less from Bill Gates (who's story I love [especially the drop out of university and create a successful company part - although my mom ultimately made me go back). [Editor's note: Coincidentally he's absolutely hilarious *(watch Bill Gates' last day of work).

As I was saying, the Zune is Microsoft's answer to the Ipod... I never had an Ipod, for, after all, I spend a great number of hours in front of the computer. When I'm not on the computer, I'm in the car, or in the living room where my entertainment unit, and my collection of CDs is. I don't jog, and as unsuccessful as my attempt to eat healthily (word?) have been, my attempts to make it to the gym make them pale in comparison... Needless to say, I had absolutely NO reason for an MP3 player, despite everyone's insistence that I get one.

So I get one. [LOL]. In a strange groundhog day sort of way (ala my Blackberry post) I don't know how I lived without it. Once I figured it out that is.

So the Zune I got is an 8meg one - which they say can hold 2000 songs... which is great until you start putting in music and realize that that's only ummm 2000 divided by umm average 12 songs per album = 166 albums. Its not that much when you start to upload all your ummm... acquired music from your computer and your albums too. If you put any video on there, that's reduced drastically, and you HAVE to put some pics on there too - your neice, your godchildren, and your own beautiful kids. Anyway, the point I'm making is - if you're buying an MP3 player - zune zune or ipod, go for the bigger one... or you'll be erasing stuff all the time to make room like my first digital camera lol...

This is quickly turning into a tech review lol... Anyway - in my limited interactions with the IPOD, I've hated the click wheel thingy, because, like many photogallery's on the internet you have to come out to go in... levels and levels. The Zune is easy to use for non fancy guys like me. [read: non-nerd]. I accidentally noticed (again like my camera) that when you turn the unit sideways, the pics turn sideways too. I'm impressed by little things. BUT - the controls flip sideways too. Ha. Oh. And it has a radio too. So I can go on a 6pm walk and listen to Scratch or Socasize to Dr. Jay on Sundays. Let's see if either happen lol. And speaking of Jay, I've set it up to get his podcasts, Wristpect's podcasts, Jester's and a couple of my favorite radio shows too. That's dope. (cause now I can listen in the car).

And my complaints... because you know there had to be some. The Zune doesn't work with my mac. And its "i-tunes" store sucks for selection. And it doesn't sell any movies (I wanted to buy Speiderman just to try it. I guess I may be a nerd). And one of the things I was looking forward to was watching TV shows - again. No go. And the BIG thing about the zune was the ability to wirelessly transfer music. When I read up, I came to understand that these TRANSFERS were to other people... Why not too and from my computer? That would make it fast and easy when I'm running out the door to drop the new jocking Jay-z or Swagger like Jay-z or any other new Jay-z that I'm trying to hear, quick and easy... And although everything has a camera, I wish it did as my Blackberry worldphone DOESN'T. So I can upload photos to both, but can't take any with either. Sigh. And it doesn't play WAV files. I noticed that by accident yesterday.

And now for the WORSE thing. I hate the software. It's slow and they're Microsoft. They should have just made it 2 explorer windows and made it drag and drop instead of this fancy, pretty Zune software, which is too complicated to work. You have to put the songs that are uploading to the zune into a "zune directory" and the zune pulls them off. Arrgh. I don't want to copy my files into a directory... I just want to drop them from where they are.

But - I can play it in the car, so at least when I do manage to get new music up on it, I can listen on my way from work to work and all points in between ummm... work. Did I mention I got a converter to change the power outlet to a plug so I can use my laptop in the car? I think I need a vacation lol.

Zune Zoon Zune...

I

p.s. As I went to press save on this blog, new software that just downloaded allows the Zune to drag and drop individual songs... I guess it's a work in progress...

IMPORTANT: PETITION FOR CIUT RE: WORLDWIDE 89.5 - PLEASE READ

"I don't sleep, I'm tired, I feel wired like codeine..." JAY-Z

What's up?

I feel hopeless. It's 4:03am and I just came off a three hour conversation with Young Future... my hope for the future - discussing the future of our city. I feel hopeless. It seems like the more things change, the more they stay the same.

I'm here praying that on the 9th of September, two days before the buildings fell down, that our tallest freestyling structure can break through where none from Toronto have before. Its a lot of pressure, but the future of Toronto's hip hop community lies squarely on the hands, and albeit large shoulders of one individual - Kardinal Offishall... and that's a lot of pressure for one guy. Even when you're 6 foot plus. {His album "Not for Sale" is in stores September 9th}.

I pray that as we TRULY know the meaning of SUPPORT next Tuesday. I'll be in the store buying a few copies or at least one to start with. Please scrape together your pennies and do the same - if Kardi doesn't make it, it's a wrap for our city...

Anyway...

This is yet another sleepless night for me - and I'm going to the radio station in and hour... Speaking of which - did I mention I feel hopeless?

I've always known that you can't build a castle in someone else's kingdom. However, I've always thought that if you do something - excellently, that somewhere along the line that you MUST be given the respect that you deserve. I find that this isn't always the case - and though I've been personally blessed, I'm disgusted that after over 10 years of service to CIUT that Jester's radio show is treated with an irreverance and lack of regard that is befitting of no one - much less someone that has been one of the leaders in fundraising and one of the highest sources of ad income for the station.

If you haven't heard, Worldwide's timeslot has been changed once again. Now instead of listening to Jester and Chief from 6-9... or from the recent 5:30am - 8:30, the show - one of the few pure sources of urban and caribbean music - will now end at 8am.

As I sit here typing to "politics as usual" in the background, I contemplate the conundrum - should Jester put up a fight and potentially upset the establishment that is CIUT fm, and even more realistically lose his radio show - or should he be quiet and take the insult {that he wasn't consulted but TOLD that this was his new time slot? Keep in mind that the time change isn't so much the insult as the lack of regard is... As is the almost seeming exclusion from the familial establishment that IS the radio station. In the almost 11 years that I've been supporting Jester - as far back as Prodigy - I've NEVER seen them included in the stations celebratory processes... I've NEVER seen them granted the ability to circumvent other programming to celebrate things such as Caribana or even their 10 year anniversary... I've never seen as much as a congratulations - a mention of their successes - so much so that I'm sure that Paul has internalized and responded in kind by not wanting to be involved so much so that I wonder if CIUT even knows that Worldwide has won accolades for college radio show of the year?}. I digress.

More important than any of my thoughts above is that we talk about support a lot in our community - our musical community, or community community... I hope that in these 2 instances, that we can ACTUALLY support...

Pick up Kardi's record on Tuesday September 9th - whether you like him or not for your city.
- and -

Make your voice heard at CIUT FM. My belief is that either direction that he goes, that we, the community that call in for fundraising or spend money on advertising should not stand by idle - as though without a voice when our voice is needed the most. We talk about respect - I think this is one on the times that you - we - make our voice heard.

Coincidentally, the time change also affects King Turbo's Morning Ride - a staple for Reggae in the community as well.

I urge you, if you enjoy the shows - listen frequently or infrequently - that you send your thoughts on the shortening of the show to those who make decisions - in the most respectful and eloquent manner possible. You are a representative of a community that is marred by stereotypes - be sure not to reinforce them...

I've included the names of the people who make the decisions. Please be sure to bcc me - ( ian@amnesia.ca ). I'm curious to see your responses to this sad state of affairs...

Station Manager:	Brian Burchell Email: b.burchell at ciut.fm
Program Director:	Ken Stowar Email: ken.stowar at ciut.fm

Til next time...


I

Bobby Brown and Ralph Tresvant Postponed. Please Forward (from August 20 9:19pm)

BOBBY BROWN & RALPH TRESVANT POSTPONED. Please forward.

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August 20 9:19pm

Mood: contemplative

Delete Entry?

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What up,

As I write you today, I’m on an emotional rollercoaster. Over the last few days and weeks, I’ve experienced the highs and lows of emotion. I want to start by making myself EXPLICITLY CLEAR in saying that ANGER is not one of them.

As you will hear from one media source or another over the next day or so, our Bobby Brown and Ralph Tresvant show with Ray Robinson and Kim Davis is postponed. I say “postponed” as we (myself, Patrick Lewis and Jay Martin), have yet to determine our next course of action. Unfortunately, before we were able to make an official statement or even formulate a formal position, one of our promotional partners pre-maturely released the “postponement”. Notwithstanding the fact that WE would have liked to have done so first, the show IS in fact now postponed. In lieu of current circumstances, we have decided that this is the BEST possible course of action at present.

Let me cut to the chase.

Over the course of the past few weeks, I have done every and all things that I have done on any large scale promotion that I’ve presented over the last few years. The flyer was everywhere - I appeared at radio, sent facebook and myspace messages as well as all other online methods, wrote on message boards, enlisted the assistance of the promotional community etc. If you know me, you know that I’m very hands on, and as such flyer my own events personally. As I flyered, I heard the comments - “he’s still alive?”; “WHY would I want to see Bobby Brown”; “He can’t cross the border!”; “Is that even real?”; “Isn’t he’s a a crackhead”; “look what he did to Whitney”; and the list goes on.

NONE of these is the reason that as I write to you today Bobby Brown and Ralph aren’t coming.

Bobby CAN cross the border. Bobby Brown is NOT a crackhead - despite the indelible images burnt into our collective psyche by media. Bobby can still sing and he can still perform.

Bobby Brown and Ralph Tresvant are not coming - and I want to re-iterate that I’m not angry as much as I am confused and disappointed - SIMPLY DUE TO LOW TICKET SALES. For whatever reason, I/we were unable to convince you, the patron, that he was worthy of a chance - worthy of being seen. The reason that I’m not mad is that you don’t HAVE to want to see every artist I/we present. Music is a SUBJECTIVE thing… A PERSONAL thing. And so the fact that I may love an artist, doesn’t mean that you don’t have to.

We will not, degrade members of musical history by putting them on stage in front of low numbers of people.

I guess my question is one of WHY it is that you didn’t want to see him. This is not a rhetorical question - I welcome your feedback - PLEASE WRITE BACK TO EITHER MYSELF DIRECTLY AT ian@amnesia.ca or channel it through one of the sources that will send this out.

I wonder if it was a simple question of waiting until you heard him on Flow this Thursday night on OTA, or on the Traffic Flow mixed show at 5pm with Ralph on Friday to confirm that he was ACTUALLY here? Was it a fear that he really can’t sing anymore? Are you of the position that you want to “remember him the way that he was”? Did you not think he could cross the border, or that he would come? Is his music just irrelevant? Or are you just broke this close to Caribana, and all the other events going on? Maybe you were coming - but funds were low, or you were waiting until Friday for payday? Is your summer over as you’ve partied too much? Was the price too high? Maybe we need proof - maybe after he performs Madison Square Garden with Keith Sweat, KRS-One and Rakim on October 2nd…

Or was it that you didn’t trust us?... Coincidentally, Patrick said, maybe we should have said in the promotion - “from the people who bring you Amnesia, Soul Kitchen, ICON, Big People, B-Boy Document, etc, the person who brought you New Edition, SWV etc, and Jamaica vs. Trinidad and Kama Sutra. He said - maybe you should remind them “that you’ve NEVER promised them something and not delivered it”, or “tell them that you wouldn’t put you money on the line when you have children to feed if you didn’t think it was possible”. I said that it is unnecessary to prove who you are to people who know who you are every single time you do something. By the way - I am not trying to illicit any sort of sympathy, I’m posing positions - but I know it’s difficult to sense tone in an email.

I am concerned that our heroes are disposable - and this theory has me feeling like Bill Cosby - the guy making sense that seems like he’s crazy. Again, I reiterate - there is no anger in my tone - only confusion. I am not trying to put ANYONE on blast, but I cram to understand why, for instance, Bobby Brown is a crackhead, but we are accepting that Lil Wayne walks around with a cup with a cocktail of cough syrup and alcohol. Is it because Lollipop is so addictive and Bobby hasn’t had a hit in years? Should we have given Mariah Carey another chance?

We judge and are unforgiving - we often give stardom and take it away - removing with it the contributions that the individuals make. The greatest rapper ever was a drug dealer from Marcy, but we’re okay with that - he makes INCREDIBLE music and doesn’t sell drugs anymore. Last week, one of the other challengers for the title of KING OF R&B, R. Kelly was acquitted. We step in the name of love to someone that married Aaliyah at the age of 15 and other things we all know of. I’m simply trying to show that we exert judgement unequally - coincidentally, in the process of getting his work permits done, I came to realize

I ask the questions - and make the statements to understand whether as one of the main promoters of things MUSICAL, whether Lauryn Hill or Whitney Houstan, D’Angelo, Superblue or even MICHAEL JACKSON are HUMANS that make mistakes and deserve our respect for the musical contributions they’ve made or whether their legacy’s are forever tarnished by the mistakes - however heinus those mistakes may be.

Being who we are - we will be providing FULL refunds to anyone who has purchased a ticket for this Saturday’s show. You can return to your point of purchase and receive a full refund - for instance Play de Record, including your service charge, or from the promoter you purchased it from in the first place. If you purchased on Ticketmaster, call and you will be refunded.

I can be contacted at 416.293.4812.

Extremely disappointed, yet still thanking you for your understanding, and looking forward to your comments,

I remain,

Yours sincerely,

Ian Andre Espinet

per
Patrick Lewis
Jay Martin

ian andre espinet
ian andre espinet entertainment +
black star graphic design & communications
canada’s leading urban graphic design studio. period.
ian andre espinet 2008

The KING of R&B... and it's not Ursher or R. Kelly...

THE KING OF R and B IS COMING TO TORONTO. SATURDAY AUGUST 23RD.

Who is the king of R and B you ask? He is a member of the single most influential male R and B group of all time. (And I know that the stats may say that Boyz II Men have sold the most, or that NKOTB or any of the other "boy bands" have sold out more concerts), but do me a favour... name ALL the members of ANY of those groups. Then show me their solo successes. Then think of all of the ones from the past... The Commodores... The Four Tops... The Jacksons? Now do the same. Right about now, you're struggling with Randy, Jackie and Marlon. Yeah - I can see it on your face.

The group is called.... New Edition. Guys wanted to be like them and girls wanted to be with them. The members were on your (or your) girlfriends' wall or locker or wall,(lol) from magazines like Right On, Word Up, Sister 2 Sister etc and when they came to town, she was in the front row or even on the grass at Kingwood or the Molson Amphitheatre. [Editor's note: I took the sleeve of "When Will I See You Smile Again" to the tailor to get a suit like that for graduation].

They went by the names of Ronnie, Bobby, Ricky and Mike, Ralph and Johnny too. Sometimes. But, before sometimes came along, there was this guy. He wasn't necessarily NUMBER 1 up on the good look chart of the group - girls each had their favorites - some loved Ralph with his soft voice and sensitivity... Some liked Ronnie - he was tall and debonair and pioneering some raps in the tunes... Some loved Biv... and others liked the mid toned Ricky. But - as I've argued over the last few years, all girls, at some point in their history loved a BAD BOY. And he was the template... for all Bad Boys that would follow from K-Ci to R. Kelly to Jagged Edge, he was THE quintessential bad boy of R and B.

He went by the name of BROWN. And everybody wanted to know what was goin' down... not with the James - not the Jim - but the BOBBY BROWN. And he was chillin' much harder cause we all knew that Bobby Brown was good to... good to... good to... go... solo.

And with that sentiment he did. After all... It was his PEROGATIVE... he could do what he wanted to do. I remember memorizing that ENTIRE video waiting for the day that I'd bend a girl over in a dance and kick my leg over her. If you see me tonight, I'll do the change pocket shake when the song comes on at Amnesia...

The guys catalogue reads like a menu. He could literally do a 3 hour show with his own stuff PLUS whatever he choses to do from New Edition...

My Perogative

Don't Be Cruel

Roni

Every Little Step (my 3rd favorite music video of all time behind Janet's Alright and Michael's Smooth Criminal)

On Our Own (my favorite Bobby fast song - and check out Halle Berry dancing backup...)

Get Away

Rock Wit'cha

She Ain't Worth It

Humpin Around

Good Enough

That's The Way Love Is
Something In Common
Two Can Play That Game
Feeling Inside
Girlfriend
Girl Next Door

And for this very special occasion, and in a tribute to summer (that I'm sure T-Rexxx and Brock would be proud of), we proudly introduce the Triumphant return of FEVER...

On August 23rd, the day's festivities start at 6pm with the BBQ and BLOCKO and continue into the night with THE CONCERT AND THE AFTERPARTY... with music by a dream DJ lineup...

STARTING FROM SCRATCH
SKIMPY
JASON CHAMBERS
P-PLUS
SKIMPY
JESTER
DOC
PRESTO
LINDO P.

and all of our friends on hand hosting...

I didn't really get to get into it the way I wanted to, as I gotta run to get something to wear to Amnesia, but I just wanted to give you this heads up...

AND A PREPURCHASE CODE: IAE FOR TICKETMASTER...
OR YOU CAN BUY DIRECTLY FROM ME FOR $35... BUT ONLY UNTIL THE 10TH.

<<<>>>

TICKETMASTER OPENS TO THE PUBLIC FOR SALES FOR $40 STARTING ON THE 10TH...so the choice is yours, but as usual, smart people plan ahead...

Take a second and hit youtube... and you'll quickly remember WHY he's the King of R and B. You may be there for hours...

More guys should be this honest lmao

LMAO. McGruber.

I can't stop laughing right now.

Random thought.... Why are you in washroom on the phone?

Lately, I've been getting a lot of messages saying "my cell phone fell in the toilet - send me your contact"...

Now. Here's my question. A wha de bumba? What on earth are you doing in the toilet with the phone? What the hell is so important?

Many a time, I've been on the phone with a young lady I'm speaking to on a level. Then all of a sudden the room sounds hollow. I know you're in the bathroom. I'm like "just call me back", and I've been told, "no... it's okay".

Really. I don't want to hear that. I don't care if I've seen it, or had extracurricular knowledge of it. When I'm in the bathroom, I want to be in there alone. And you should too.

Yu nasty wretch. I'm not using your phone when I come to your house. I don't doubt you washed your hands, but I know you didn't wash your phone?

Yu wretch yu.

Just a random thought.

I

p.s. And if you're a man, don't be talking and holding big conversation when I'm in the washroom. And don't try to hail me. I don't want to shake your hand in there.

p.p.s. They should make all washrooms with those walls that you walk around, cause many a time, I've been trapped in the washroom waiting for someone to come in and open the door.

p.p.p.s. And they should put a garbage bin directly outside - cause I use the paper towel to open the door and then have no where to throw it.

I'm going through it. Again. The Quarter-Life Crisis. V2

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis."

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.

You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all.

You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not.

You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person.

You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make decision.

You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

What's up?

I'm going through it. Again. And I'm past the first quarter of my life. Just when I thought it was over. The remix.

Somehow I thought with 30 that the problems written about in the "quarter-life crisis" that I first posted some 8 years ago would have transformed into gatherings at my new home with friends and like minded individuals for dinner parties and barbeques. Myself and my friends joked that "one day we'd all be sitting in the backyard laughing at the things we went through to get here". Although "here" is coming, "here" isn't coming soon enough. I think he got lost close by.

For some strange reason, I thought 30 was it. There was something special about it. A seriousness. All of a sudden I was mobilized. I had WANTED to move out, but now I was actively searching. I wanted to save, but all of a sudden I was putting the mechanics in place - setting up bank accounts, pre-authorizing this, paying down that. There was a seriousness - I HAD to do it. And I did. I bought a house. I was afraid as hell. I didn't ask advice of my lawyer mother or my business minded father, I only took them for an opinion on the house itself. I was asserting my adulthood - I was being a man.

I dreamt that with the adulthood that 30 brought that my relationship with my parents would take on new life - one born of the respect that comes from being an adult and one that would be reciprocated as they started to see me as one too. And it did. My relationship with my parents improved with me moving out - and I'm not sure if it's because I was out of their space, because they were proud of me or because they missed me, but it was getting better. I spoke to my mother more than ever, and my dad I bonded - first through the things we were doing together like Mas, but just in general. He was so cute - he'd bring me bread on Sunday mornings - I think secretly, they thought I was probably starving to death, and she was sending him to make sure I wasn't, and to spy on whether my house was a mess. Our roles started to reverse, with me giving them advice as opposed to vice versa, and for the first time in my life, they actually listened to me when I spoke.

30 was it. Stuff was getting better. Things that bothered me were starting to fade away.

I started to heal and thought somehow that maybe after the failure of my relationship with my child's mother that I would find love again - and did, only for one of the best relationships I'd ever had to end. Again. Adult relationships brought even more frightening realizations than 20 something ones had. A relationship was no longer just about love, but about a whole bunch of other stuff, including money. It was about your family and their family. It was about the way that we thought children should be raised, about religion, about where we wanted to go individually, and as a team, goals, dreams, support and a whole bunch of other stuff. It ended, and I realized that my ideal that "love would carry us through all things" was actually flawed. As a good friend, Dwayne Morgan told me, "sometimes, love just isn't enough". I was here, in the house that we had spoken of, which as I plotted, with her beside me, and she wasn't going to enjoy it, or see me do so.

I resigned myself to thinking, "that's life". I created new mantra, which included not caring so much about what people thought. It was a problem that my ex had with me, and one that truthfully I knew had to end. It was behind a self punishment that I needed to put to rest that included the shame that I internally went through under the judgement that I, Ian, who no one expected it of, had had a baby out of wedlock. This, coupled with knowing that the family is the foundation of any community and that as a "community minded" guy that people would judge me on actions that seemed contradictory, I was weighed down. This however, too had started to fade. I resigned myself to the fact that I would do it "properly" the "next time around". I got past the "child out of wedlock" judgement and found solace in the fact that I AM not a bad person - I'm not a baby father - I'm a parent, and a quite good one actually. I resigned myself to the fact that I couldn't worry about what people would say. They always have something to say - regardless.

I also dreamt that 30 would bring stability in the waxing and waning argument in my head of career vs. job and profession vs. both. Each year I had grappled with going back to school to do something else. As well, I yearn(ed) to be a global citizen, and to do more. I thought for some reason that the work that I'd put in to this point would also bring carefree financials. Of course, if you're in any job for a certain number of years, that job must start to bring some sort of stability... right?

One by one these things started to happen. I started to create a new group of friends with like minds and opinions. The money was coming. I tried dating again, to realize it was a big waste of time. I did however, meet some really cool girls. There was potential. I was living in my home, working hard, enjoying life a little, and enjoying some company.

Then it started to unravel...

To be continued.

It's true. Toronto men ARE punks.

What's up?

It's Tuesday, and my mind is all over the place... However, I just emptied it into my blog, and as that was the majority of what I was thinking of today (outside of the conversations being sparked over Now magazine's cover story on Hip Hop in Toronto - I'm sure I'll spout something off about that in the next few hours). I've transcribed my blog stuff into my email and my email's p.s' into my blog. Now you don't have to read both.

So here's what I was thinking today.

IT'S TRUE.

After years of arguing with my female friends, this past Saturday at re:connect, I realized it. It's true. Toronto men are punks. Yes. We are. Yes Jem. You've been right all this time. Alright already... If I wanted to be nagged I'd go back to my ex. (Not any ex in particular - it's a phrase).

I have, for years, vehemently defended the men in Toronto. Us. I've stated in true Jay-z 22 twos form that "too many ladies in Toronto are stuck up from too many sexual advances". I've sited examples like my friend Keith asking for the time only to receive a rude response; to my own experience trying to tell a girl that her skirt was in her pantyhose to a response of "Arrrgh. I'm here with someone". I wasn't trying to pick you up girl. I was just trying to show you that your arse was outta door. Don't flatter yourself.

But this past Saturday, I was forced to face facts. I held a small "private like party" for about 150 friends and acquaintances. Re:connect. Like a house party but without a house kinda vibe - although they did beat the wall as one point. Now granted there were just under 100 people there, but in the quaint surroundings of Toika, it was a good little party.

Jester was just killing it. I was jamming. Then I noticed. All the ladies were on or around the dance floor. Some were looking like they were leaning of a base in baseball ready to run to the washroom if the pitcher took his eye off them. All the guys were leaning by the bar. The bar. Nursing a drink.

Now. The ladies really really came out looking nice. Really nice. Really really nice. And they looked like they were down to meet someone. I suggested to some of the guys that they approach and make conversation. As the evening went on, I physically pushed the guys on to the dancefloor. They resisted... like when you're trying to pull a dog into a bathtub? Like that. They argued that it would be suicidal to approach ladies in groups that large lol.

Eventually, everyone ended up on the dance floor together and as the dancing heated up, so too did the interaction. [Editor's note: The interaction wasn't the only thing that heated up... hopefully Spud's picture of the back of my light blue shirt turned dark blue with sweat doesn't materialize on Facebook, but if it does, at least I put it out there first lol].

I digress. For years, my female friends have complained. They've applauded the forward nature of our American counterparts - and I've dismissed it as Mikeyism. They'll eat anything, and somehow that has worked for them. And we won't. Furthermore, I've argued that American men pay to play - and we don't. I've argued that if they buy you a drink that there comes and expectation with that drink. If they take you out for dinner, there's a price for that too. And maybe there is. But you know what? We're STILL just not forward enough. I don't mean we should be walking up asking how she likes her eggs in the morning... fertilized? But damn. We're like mimes. And this includes me. I don't approach women.

I'm terrified. We're terrified. But not for the reason that Toronto's women have deluded themselves to thinking we are. No ladies. Sorry to burst your bubble. We're not intimidated by the fact that you have your ish together. It's not your paycheck. Or your education. It's not your nice car, or your beautiful home. No... it's not that you have stuff and we don't or that you're further ahead in life and that frightens us. (Many times you think that even though it's not the case and we can't be bothered to correct you to make ourselves worthy... we just let you go on talking your ish).

We're afraid of rejection - plain and simple - and probably not without cause as Toronto women are one half of the reason we're the screwface capital. As Monolith so poetic-ly put it years ago, "West end got girls by the plenty, East end got girls by the plenty, Megacity got girls by the plenty, but ain't too much a dem gyals friendly". Say word. Word.

But with that said, Toronto is also home to the most beautiful women on earth. And lately the most lonely. Living with cats in big houses by themselves lonely. With lots of certificates and degrees on their walls and no one to push their feet under on the couch (I HATE THAT) lonely. Watching movies alone and telling themselves that they don't need a man lonely. [Editor's note: If I hear one more woman say she doesn't need a man, I may scream. NO. You don't need a man. You don't need an arm, but it's a good friggin idea]. Back to my point. Toronto women are lonely. Oh so lonely. And Toronto guys aren't stepping up. Not the ones my age anyway.

Sidebar. Not the one's my age anyway. This has led to the cougar effect. Rooaaaorr. It's all the rage. Every woman I know right now is dating younger. If they're 38 they're dating 28. If they're 33 they're dating 26. If they're 26 they're dating 19. Although I might warrant a guess that they've got more interest and stamina than my peers, that's not it. The young bwoy dem are interested. And I had too long a day in my corporate world to ask too many questions about what happened in yours. Cause frankly, I'm really just trying to put this mortgage down. And he's really just trying to find out if you resolved the problem with the woman from the office of "blah blah" that was bothering you.

So its true. I had noticed it for months proceeding, but it wasn't until I heard the loud cries of "If he don't love you... the way he should... then let him go" on Saturday that I realized the writing was on the wall. Many Toronto men are afflicted with that disease, Bitchassness, that Diddy was talking about *(see p.s.' for link).

This is my official call for Toronto men to stand up. This Friday, there are going to be about 350 ladies in a club called Blurr for an event called Soul Kitchen ~ Soundtracks. Pause. In defence of the Toronto men at the party on Saturday night, they all looked, dressed, and smelled fly. However, I must say, that generally speaking, the ladies - scene to scene - from soca to reggae... r&b to hip hop, fashionista to baller to fake baller scenes just generally look better than the men. Toronto men - STEP YOUR GAME UP.

There will be 350 mature ladies between the ages of 23-35 on Friday night at Soul Kitchen and another 200 from the soca scene on Saturday at Big People Fete. Like Russell Peters said "Be a man".

Stop that bitchassness now... (I'm getting the shirt - available fnow from Sean John LOL - no really.).

Oh... I almost forgot. This is an entertainment email list. So here's how it goes down for the weekend. And I did say there was good news, bad news and more good news.

So as you hopefully know by now, it's finally the week for the most anticipated Soul Kitchen concept event that I've done since - ummm Mary J. Blige or maybe Lauryn Hill tributes... This Friday, we pay tribute to all the best music from our favorite movies... From Strictly Business to Mo Money... School Daze to Boomerang... Sprung to Blue Streak... Belly to... You get the idea.

The $10 all night guestlist for this Friday's Soul Kitchen ~ Soundtrack edition is CLOSING - consider this your last warning... Govern yourself accordingly or you may receive an email saying "unfortunately the guestlist for this Friday's Soul Kitchen is closed". Last chance.

Sidebar: The doors at Soul Kitchen were closed just after midnight at the Valentine's Edition for capacity. THIS EVENT WILL SELL OUT. That's not rhetoric... it's fact. Come early or hear about it in the morning.

I have however, opened up a $10 all night guestlist for the Saturday's Big People Fete. I had printed tickets weeks ago, but in all honesty and truth, I wasn't going anywhere to flyer in the sub-artic weather, so I decided to do this instead. This one, however, is limited to 100 people for myself and 100 for Dr. Jay, so again, govern yourself accordingly. I've had a ton of calls asking price, dress code etc and they are as follow. Admission to BPF is $10 before midnight, and $15 after. Dress code is adult. If you have to ask, don't wear it. Attitude is Big People. Not old. Big. No kids. The venue, the Great Iron Pot, only holds 350 and this is the first Big People Fete of the year. Need I say more?

Oh. Good news. Everyday without fail I get a few emails about Amnesia. We're coming. Sooner than we expected. Look out for the sickest 3 man team since ummm Tribe Called... (yes Frank... that was 4), umm? Elimidate? I don't know. Since. Ever.

Gotta run... but if you're interested in the hip hop scene in Toronto, there's a story in this week's NOW magazine that you may want to check out. I think I may blog about it later...

http://www.nowtoronto.com/music/story.cfm?content=162220

Shoutout to NOW magazine who listed me in the "Get your Hip Hop Fix" listing the clubs and promoters you need to know... Although I think there are far more deserving "hip hop promoters", I'll take the forward graciously... Actually, it was good, as they uncovered a link that I haven't used in years that I was forced to update - anybody seen Jef from Toronto-lime? I fear he may be at Jamaica's carnival...

Until next time...

Dance like no one's watching, sing like you're in your room with your brush, eat (but not more than you need), and try to be happy. Desiderata.

Yours sincerely,

Ian Andre Espinet (still Dre).

p.s. Check out my new blog at http://ianandreespinet.blogspot.com/

p.p.s. So it's evident Alicia Keys has a thing for Jamaicans like those guys from Roots Canada, the ill Nana (Fox Boogie Brown) and Lauryn Hill, but damn, what's up with all the frumpy reggae remixes? They sound like what I would imagine the "reggae" setting would be on a casio keyboard.

p.p.p.s. Boonks booonks... boooonks bunks.... (the sound we make when we think of reggae).

p.p.p.p.s. You know... like when you think of calypso, you go "ting ti ta ting ting"

p.p.p.p.p.s And when you think of hip hop, you want to cross your arms and do a beatbox like the fatboys...

p.p.p.p.p.p.s. It seems that Toronto guys are going on with some bi%cha$sness.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Click here, to learn about the affliction Diddy has commonly referred to as "bi%cha$sness". LMAO. Get your official no bi%cha$sness t-shirt here... http://www.seanjohn.com/shop/ Diddy is the greatest marketer of all time.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Damn Gina! My little manicurist (you're wrong... she's not Korean), scrapped up my backfoot so clean, that I nearly fell and buss my ish in the shower, and then again in the kitchen today. I guess I need a little sand paper for traction.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. I had to get it cleaned up... its just not hot when your footback pulls on the bed sheets... but it sure does come in handy when you need to scratch your other foot. Don't front. You know you do it.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Who in he!! greenlighted that Mariah Carey "Touch my body" song.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Do you love the Boondocks? Do you hate BET? If so, you need to see the banned Boondocks Season Season 02, Episode 14... Watch it here! Warning... this may be offensive to some.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Isn't it funny how when we stop to talk about our favorite songs from Soundtracks, and Soul Kitchen in general, someone always says "I did a dance to that song"? Laugh. You know it's true.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Isn't it even funnier how everyone has a "I was a dancer" story from their youth? We couldn't have ALL been dancers... Some of us kinda sucked. LOL.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Congrats to our home town heroes Jully Black and Russel Peters who will be holding down the Junos. I've never had a reason to watch before. That's the realest talk ever.