Sigh. That's what I just did.
I'm not sure how to write this - but if there was a phrase to describe my emotions last night, the one "waiting to exhale" would probably do it. Partially. As about a hundred of us sat at Islandmix, me darting back and forth speaking to different people with understanding of the US election process (California's worth 51... but if he wins Florida, it's mathematically impossible to...), and repeating what I learnt elsewhere, I was waiting - to exhale. I was anxious - sick, happy, excited, in awe of what I was seeing, in disbelief, scared, giddy, longing, confident, sceptic - and volatile. Meaning, I knew that I was going to cry, I just didn't know when.
Last night, as I got home at minutes to 11 (yes... I left early to take my little one home), CNN called it. And just like that, it was over. On came the tears. I haven't cried in ages, although I must admit I've had a couple in the last couple years after a 10 year streak. [Sidebar: watching your parents friends and your own pass away, and your relationships/friendships of long time disintegrate will do that to you...]. I knew that it was going to happen, as earlier, while explaining separate schools, drinking fountains, people being hosed and bitten by dogs, sit-ins, marches and Rosa Parks to my daughter, I repeated the text that I had gotten a thousand times that day - Rosa sat so Martin could walk... Martin walked so that Obama could run... and Obama is running so that our children can FLY. And on came the tears... She was like "are you ok daddy?". I told her that they were tears of JOY.
In conversations, I reiterated that it didn't MATTER whether Barack won or lost - that the impact of what he had - HAS done for the way that we see ourselves, that others see us, and most importantly the way that our children perceive themselves, was already done. BUT. It WAS important that he won. Mignotte argued that the impact of losing would from many standpoints, put Black people and the entire United States back 20 years. First, we may have acted irrationally and further perpetuated stereotypes - worse yet, the emotion created from the loss - if felt cheated, could have created a race divide of catastrophic proportions.
What I realized later, as the Black commentator on CNN summarized my thoughts was this - "for years we've told our children that they can be ANYTHING that they want to be - sercretly knowing that we were lying... knowing that there were things that they COULDN'T be". This was no longer the case... And excellence is something that one does by example, and so Obama can single handedly reverse many of the stereotypes and assumptions by simply BEING... not by being BLACK, but by being excellent and happening to BE Black.
Coincidentally, had he lost, it would have been a statement as well - WHY bother being the best, if the best means nothing if you're Black. It would have been a restatement of the frustration of being the best, but being "overqualified" or "not suited to the job" or "not exactly what we were looking for". But that's not the case this November 5th. The United States picked - whether you agree with his politics or not - the person that was SELECTED, and he happened to be Black and in spite of the fact that he is Black. And his success is a universal success - little girls can be President... and people of all races, creeds, religions can be ANYTHING. If you're the best. The United States should be proud as they have not just a President that is an African American - but the BEST person for the job from . They should also be proud that they were able to have a competition - a hard fought competition - where the clash of ideas and the winner is chosen, and the winner was ACTUALLY chosen. And I'm happy that, although I thought he was on track to win, that I was WRONG about what I secretly thought of the US -
Barack Obama IS THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. And the culmination or all of our dreams. As I watched CNN, my phone rang off the hook - Rishi... Amanda from Japan... Dwayne Morgan... and countless others - Future blackberry pinned me from Times Square - and described it best. "I feel like I'm in a dream. This is surreal". Unreal. Ro said this morning, "I'm driving to work and the leaves are dropping in slow mo... I feel like I'm talking like a one year old - I don't have the words to describe the words I'm feeling. It still hasn't sunk in properly".
I don't think it has for any of us...
I'm inspired... I'm inspired to do more. To return to my spot on Worldwide with the Black history moment - which I reiterate is OUR collective history - which I do as much for Black children and adults, as I do for White, Chinese, Indian, etc - because from understanding comes change. As I've also said at the beginning of that segment, history is a continuum - and we are as much a PART of history as those making it... It's not just the past. It's the present and what it means to our future as well.
Not to compare or belittle what I would say was the single most significant historical moment of MY life thus far, I'd like to take a moment to speak on a couple of pieces of HISTORY that are being made right now that - like what happened last night - I don't think people are personally understanding the significance of.
This past weekend, I attended Soca or Die, Dr. Jay de Soca Prince's birthday celebration and again was awed by the fact that World's Number One soca DJ lives in our city. And that the world's most passionate soca SCENE is ours. We play and listen to more soca, have more fetes and concerts than ANYWHERE it seems. Saturday gone, 6 artists representing the best of the Caribbean touched down on the stage - as chosen by the people in this city in a vote. I think as much time as we spend complaining about the things that we DON'T have in this city, we have to take a moment to celebrate the incredible things that we DO have... Happy birthday Jay - and thanks for being a part of the living history of this city.
The second example of living history takes place this Saturday and pertains to my partner and friend, DJ Starting from Scratch. I'm not sure if you've heard, but Scratch is the OFFICIAL TOUR DJ FOR USHER RAYMOND. Although I'll admit that Scratch's humility is a part of the reason that no one else thinks that it's that big of a deal, let me stop and take a second to explain why it is.
Usher is one of the BIGGEST artists of OUR time period. A couple months back, I argued that Bobby Brown was a King of R&B... and that the other heirs to that title were R. Kelly, Usher, and some day - Chris Brown. He has sold 35 million albums worldwide, and won 5 Grammy's. He is a member of Billboard magazine's All Time Hot 100 artists, and is one of the FEW artists of our time mentioned there - not to mention Urban.
And Scratch is his DJ. And not simply playing opening and closing music dj - part of the show, going back and forth with Usher competing with him. This is one of the most significant things to happen to a Toronto DJ - and competes with A-Trak becoming Kanye's dj - for an Urban DJ. Usher comes to town this Saturday at Koolhaus, and Scratch will be on stage doing what he's done for us for years - and making us proud.
This Saturday at Solarium, we're celebrating this man's life - his birthday... the information is listed below so that you can come down and show your appreciation for someone that has put on for his city time after time... Happy birthday Scratch - and thank you for being a part of the living history of this city...
Finally, around 12 years ago, a friend of mine, Kevin Blagrove introduced me to a guy that has been a constant inspiration for me. His name is Dwayne Morgan and he is one of the people that I go to when I need inspiration as he seems forever inspired. 15 years ago, he produced his first events - and as the story goes, one of them was in the basement of small gym over here at Kennedy and 401. They moved the weights and Black Love took place.
Shortly thereafter, I would have the honour of designing for him for 10 years - Black Love... When Brothers Speak... When Sisters Speak... This Ain't Love Jones... Making of a Man... Edutainment... Strictly Roots... Roots and Relaxation... The Roots Lounge... Last One Standing... Yin and Yang... The Toronto International Poetry Slam... Soul Sessions... 5 books... 5 cds... countless awards. Next Friday and Saturday, he will release his 15 YEAR Anniversary DVD - wow... as I type 15 years I shake my head - the amount of work that this guy has done, further inspires me to do more... It's not your birthday, although it is "When Brother's Speak's" 10 Year Anniversary - but Dwayne Morgan, THANK YOU for being a part of the living history of Toronto...
And thank you to the 3 of you for the part that you've individually played in my personal success with Black Star and the Entertainment company.
Although there are far too many Scorpios, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JULLY BLACK - another source of inspiration for me, and YET another example of the living history makers in our great city. And although someone will undoubtedly wonder why I spent half of my email talking about these people, like Kanye said, "If you admire someone you should go ahead and tell em, people never get the flowers while they can still smell em"... These 4 and countless others are a part of our unique and INCREDIBLE Toronto history...
Thank you for reading and being a part of mine.
I'm not sure how to write this - but if there was a phrase to describe my emotions last night, the one "waiting to exhale" would probably do it. Partially. As about a hundred of us sat at Islandmix, me darting back and forth speaking to different people with understanding of the US election process (California's worth 51... but if he wins Florida, it's mathematically impossible to...), and repeating what I learnt elsewhere, I was waiting - to exhale. I was anxious - sick, happy, excited, in awe of what I was seeing, in disbelief, scared, giddy, longing, confident, sceptic - and volatile. Meaning, I knew that I was going to cry, I just didn't know when.
Last night, as I got home at minutes to 11 (yes... I left early to take my little one home), CNN called it. And just like that, it was over. On came the tears. I haven't cried in ages, although I must admit I've had a couple in the last couple years after a 10 year streak. [Sidebar: watching your parents friends and your own pass away, and your relationships/friendships of long time disintegrate will do that to you...]. I knew that it was going to happen, as earlier, while explaining separate schools, drinking fountains, people being hosed and bitten by dogs, sit-ins, marches and Rosa Parks to my daughter, I repeated the text that I had gotten a thousand times that day - Rosa sat so Martin could walk... Martin walked so that Obama could run... and Obama is running so that our children can FLY. And on came the tears... She was like "are you ok daddy?". I told her that they were tears of JOY.
In conversations, I reiterated that it didn't MATTER whether Barack won or lost - that the impact of what he had - HAS done for the way that we see ourselves, that others see us, and most importantly the way that our children perceive themselves, was already done. BUT. It WAS important that he won. Mignotte argued that the impact of losing would from many standpoints, put Black people and the entire United States back 20 years. First, we may have acted irrationally and further perpetuated stereotypes - worse yet, the emotion created from the loss - if felt cheated, could have created a race divide of catastrophic proportions.
What I realized later, as the Black commentator on CNN summarized my thoughts was this - "for years we've told our children that they can be ANYTHING that they want to be - sercretly knowing that we were lying... knowing that there were things that they COULDN'T be". This was no longer the case... And excellence is something that one does by example, and so Obama can single handedly reverse many of the stereotypes and assumptions by simply BEING... not by being BLACK, but by being excellent and happening to BE Black.
Coincidentally, had he lost, it would have been a statement as well - WHY bother being the best, if the best means nothing if you're Black. It would have been a restatement of the frustration of being the best, but being "overqualified" or "not suited to the job" or "not exactly what we were looking for". But that's not the case this November 5th. The United States picked - whether you agree with his politics or not - the person that was SELECTED, and he happened to be Black and in spite of the fact that he is Black. And his success is a universal success - little girls can be President... and people of all races, creeds, religions can be ANYTHING. If you're the best. The United States should be proud as they have not just a President that is an African American - but the BEST person for the job from . They should also be proud that they were able to have a competition - a hard fought competition - where the clash of ideas and the winner is chosen, and the winner was ACTUALLY chosen. And I'm happy that, although I thought he was on track to win, that I was WRONG about what I secretly thought of the US -
Barack Obama IS THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. And the culmination or all of our dreams. As I watched CNN, my phone rang off the hook - Rishi... Amanda from Japan... Dwayne Morgan... and countless others - Future blackberry pinned me from Times Square - and described it best. "I feel like I'm in a dream. This is surreal". Unreal. Ro said this morning, "I'm driving to work and the leaves are dropping in slow mo... I feel like I'm talking like a one year old - I don't have the words to describe the words I'm feeling. It still hasn't sunk in properly".
I don't think it has for any of us...
I'm inspired... I'm inspired to do more. To return to my spot on Worldwide with the Black history moment - which I reiterate is OUR collective history - which I do as much for Black children and adults, as I do for White, Chinese, Indian, etc - because from understanding comes change. As I've also said at the beginning of that segment, history is a continuum - and we are as much a PART of history as those making it... It's not just the past. It's the present and what it means to our future as well.
Not to compare or belittle what I would say was the single most significant historical moment of MY life thus far, I'd like to take a moment to speak on a couple of pieces of HISTORY that are being made right now that - like what happened last night - I don't think people are personally understanding the significance of.
This past weekend, I attended Soca or Die, Dr. Jay de Soca Prince's birthday celebration and again was awed by the fact that World's Number One soca DJ lives in our city. And that the world's most passionate soca SCENE is ours. We play and listen to more soca, have more fetes and concerts than ANYWHERE it seems. Saturday gone, 6 artists representing the best of the Caribbean touched down on the stage - as chosen by the people in this city in a vote. I think as much time as we spend complaining about the things that we DON'T have in this city, we have to take a moment to celebrate the incredible things that we DO have... Happy birthday Jay - and thanks for being a part of the living history of this city.
The second example of living history takes place this Saturday and pertains to my partner and friend, DJ Starting from Scratch. I'm not sure if you've heard, but Scratch is the OFFICIAL TOUR DJ FOR USHER RAYMOND. Although I'll admit that Scratch's humility is a part of the reason that no one else thinks that it's that big of a deal, let me stop and take a second to explain why it is.
Usher is one of the BIGGEST artists of OUR time period. A couple months back, I argued that Bobby Brown was a King of R&B... and that the other heirs to that title were R. Kelly, Usher, and some day - Chris Brown. He has sold 35 million albums worldwide, and won 5 Grammy's. He is a member of Billboard magazine's All Time Hot 100 artists, and is one of the FEW artists of our time mentioned there - not to mention Urban.
And Scratch is his DJ. And not simply playing opening and closing music dj - part of the show, going back and forth with Usher competing with him. This is one of the most significant things to happen to a Toronto DJ - and competes with A-Trak becoming Kanye's dj - for an Urban DJ. Usher comes to town this Saturday at Koolhaus, and Scratch will be on stage doing what he's done for us for years - and making us proud.
This Saturday at Solarium, we're celebrating this man's life - his birthday... the information is listed below so that you can come down and show your appreciation for someone that has put on for his city time after time... Happy birthday Scratch - and thank you for being a part of the living history of this city...
Finally, around 12 years ago, a friend of mine, Kevin Blagrove introduced me to a guy that has been a constant inspiration for me. His name is Dwayne Morgan and he is one of the people that I go to when I need inspiration as he seems forever inspired. 15 years ago, he produced his first events - and as the story goes, one of them was in the basement of small gym over here at Kennedy and 401. They moved the weights and Black Love took place.
Shortly thereafter, I would have the honour of designing for him for 10 years - Black Love... When Brothers Speak... When Sisters Speak... This Ain't Love Jones... Making of a Man... Edutainment... Strictly Roots... Roots and Relaxation... The Roots Lounge... Last One Standing... Yin and Yang... The Toronto International Poetry Slam... Soul Sessions... 5 books... 5 cds... countless awards. Next Friday and Saturday, he will release his 15 YEAR Anniversary DVD - wow... as I type 15 years I shake my head - the amount of work that this guy has done, further inspires me to do more... It's not your birthday, although it is "When Brother's Speak's" 10 Year Anniversary - but Dwayne Morgan, THANK YOU for being a part of the living history of Toronto...
And thank you to the 3 of you for the part that you've individually played in my personal success with Black Star and the Entertainment company.
Although there are far too many Scorpios, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JULLY BLACK - another source of inspiration for me, and YET another example of the living history makers in our great city. And although someone will undoubtedly wonder why I spent half of my email talking about these people, like Kanye said, "If you admire someone you should go ahead and tell em, people never get the flowers while they can still smell em"... These 4 and countless others are a part of our unique and INCREDIBLE Toronto history...
Thank you for reading and being a part of mine.
Yours sincerely,
IAN ANDRE ESPINET
ian andre espinet
ian andre espinet entertainment +
black star graphic design & communications
canada's leading urban graphic design studio. period.
ian andre espinet 2007
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3 comments:
This was one of the most compelling postings of what Nov 4th felt like from someone outside the U.S. I can relate to the "leaves falling in slow motion" on the way to work part...you know its funny...you were able to articulate how we felt the day after...Brand New...like this was my first day on earth.
Very nice!
wow very nice posting!
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