It's true. Toronto men ARE punks.

What's up?

It's Tuesday, and my mind is all over the place... However, I just emptied it into my blog, and as that was the majority of what I was thinking of today (outside of the conversations being sparked over Now magazine's cover story on Hip Hop in Toronto - I'm sure I'll spout something off about that in the next few hours). I've transcribed my blog stuff into my email and my email's p.s' into my blog. Now you don't have to read both.

So here's what I was thinking today.

IT'S TRUE.

After years of arguing with my female friends, this past Saturday at re:connect, I realized it. It's true. Toronto men are punks. Yes. We are. Yes Jem. You've been right all this time. Alright already... If I wanted to be nagged I'd go back to my ex. (Not any ex in particular - it's a phrase).

I have, for years, vehemently defended the men in Toronto. Us. I've stated in true Jay-z 22 twos form that "too many ladies in Toronto are stuck up from too many sexual advances". I've sited examples like my friend Keith asking for the time only to receive a rude response; to my own experience trying to tell a girl that her skirt was in her pantyhose to a response of "Arrrgh. I'm here with someone". I wasn't trying to pick you up girl. I was just trying to show you that your arse was outta door. Don't flatter yourself.

But this past Saturday, I was forced to face facts. I held a small "private like party" for about 150 friends and acquaintances. Re:connect. Like a house party but without a house kinda vibe - although they did beat the wall as one point. Now granted there were just under 100 people there, but in the quaint surroundings of Toika, it was a good little party.

Jester was just killing it. I was jamming. Then I noticed. All the ladies were on or around the dance floor. Some were looking like they were leaning of a base in baseball ready to run to the washroom if the pitcher took his eye off them. All the guys were leaning by the bar. The bar. Nursing a drink.

Now. The ladies really really came out looking nice. Really nice. Really really nice. And they looked like they were down to meet someone. I suggested to some of the guys that they approach and make conversation. As the evening went on, I physically pushed the guys on to the dancefloor. They resisted... like when you're trying to pull a dog into a bathtub? Like that. They argued that it would be suicidal to approach ladies in groups that large lol.

Eventually, everyone ended up on the dance floor together and as the dancing heated up, so too did the interaction. [Editor's note: The interaction wasn't the only thing that heated up... hopefully Spud's picture of the back of my light blue shirt turned dark blue with sweat doesn't materialize on Facebook, but if it does, at least I put it out there first lol].

I digress. For years, my female friends have complained. They've applauded the forward nature of our American counterparts - and I've dismissed it as Mikeyism. They'll eat anything, and somehow that has worked for them. And we won't. Furthermore, I've argued that American men pay to play - and we don't. I've argued that if they buy you a drink that there comes and expectation with that drink. If they take you out for dinner, there's a price for that too. And maybe there is. But you know what? We're STILL just not forward enough. I don't mean we should be walking up asking how she likes her eggs in the morning... fertilized? But damn. We're like mimes. And this includes me. I don't approach women.

I'm terrified. We're terrified. But not for the reason that Toronto's women have deluded themselves to thinking we are. No ladies. Sorry to burst your bubble. We're not intimidated by the fact that you have your ish together. It's not your paycheck. Or your education. It's not your nice car, or your beautiful home. No... it's not that you have stuff and we don't or that you're further ahead in life and that frightens us. (Many times you think that even though it's not the case and we can't be bothered to correct you to make ourselves worthy... we just let you go on talking your ish).

We're afraid of rejection - plain and simple - and probably not without cause as Toronto women are one half of the reason we're the screwface capital. As Monolith so poetic-ly put it years ago, "West end got girls by the plenty, East end got girls by the plenty, Megacity got girls by the plenty, but ain't too much a dem gyals friendly". Say word. Word.

But with that said, Toronto is also home to the most beautiful women on earth. And lately the most lonely. Living with cats in big houses by themselves lonely. With lots of certificates and degrees on their walls and no one to push their feet under on the couch (I HATE THAT) lonely. Watching movies alone and telling themselves that they don't need a man lonely. [Editor's note: If I hear one more woman say she doesn't need a man, I may scream. NO. You don't need a man. You don't need an arm, but it's a good friggin idea]. Back to my point. Toronto women are lonely. Oh so lonely. And Toronto guys aren't stepping up. Not the ones my age anyway.

Sidebar. Not the one's my age anyway. This has led to the cougar effect. Rooaaaorr. It's all the rage. Every woman I know right now is dating younger. If they're 38 they're dating 28. If they're 33 they're dating 26. If they're 26 they're dating 19. Although I might warrant a guess that they've got more interest and stamina than my peers, that's not it. The young bwoy dem are interested. And I had too long a day in my corporate world to ask too many questions about what happened in yours. Cause frankly, I'm really just trying to put this mortgage down. And he's really just trying to find out if you resolved the problem with the woman from the office of "blah blah" that was bothering you.

So its true. I had noticed it for months proceeding, but it wasn't until I heard the loud cries of "If he don't love you... the way he should... then let him go" on Saturday that I realized the writing was on the wall. Many Toronto men are afflicted with that disease, Bitchassness, that Diddy was talking about *(see p.s.' for link).

This is my official call for Toronto men to stand up. This Friday, there are going to be about 350 ladies in a club called Blurr for an event called Soul Kitchen ~ Soundtracks. Pause. In defence of the Toronto men at the party on Saturday night, they all looked, dressed, and smelled fly. However, I must say, that generally speaking, the ladies - scene to scene - from soca to reggae... r&b to hip hop, fashionista to baller to fake baller scenes just generally look better than the men. Toronto men - STEP YOUR GAME UP.

There will be 350 mature ladies between the ages of 23-35 on Friday night at Soul Kitchen and another 200 from the soca scene on Saturday at Big People Fete. Like Russell Peters said "Be a man".

Stop that bitchassness now... (I'm getting the shirt - available fnow from Sean John LOL - no really.).

Oh... I almost forgot. This is an entertainment email list. So here's how it goes down for the weekend. And I did say there was good news, bad news and more good news.

So as you hopefully know by now, it's finally the week for the most anticipated Soul Kitchen concept event that I've done since - ummm Mary J. Blige or maybe Lauryn Hill tributes... This Friday, we pay tribute to all the best music from our favorite movies... From Strictly Business to Mo Money... School Daze to Boomerang... Sprung to Blue Streak... Belly to... You get the idea.

The $10 all night guestlist for this Friday's Soul Kitchen ~ Soundtrack edition is CLOSING - consider this your last warning... Govern yourself accordingly or you may receive an email saying "unfortunately the guestlist for this Friday's Soul Kitchen is closed". Last chance.

Sidebar: The doors at Soul Kitchen were closed just after midnight at the Valentine's Edition for capacity. THIS EVENT WILL SELL OUT. That's not rhetoric... it's fact. Come early or hear about it in the morning.

I have however, opened up a $10 all night guestlist for the Saturday's Big People Fete. I had printed tickets weeks ago, but in all honesty and truth, I wasn't going anywhere to flyer in the sub-artic weather, so I decided to do this instead. This one, however, is limited to 100 people for myself and 100 for Dr. Jay, so again, govern yourself accordingly. I've had a ton of calls asking price, dress code etc and they are as follow. Admission to BPF is $10 before midnight, and $15 after. Dress code is adult. If you have to ask, don't wear it. Attitude is Big People. Not old. Big. No kids. The venue, the Great Iron Pot, only holds 350 and this is the first Big People Fete of the year. Need I say more?

Oh. Good news. Everyday without fail I get a few emails about Amnesia. We're coming. Sooner than we expected. Look out for the sickest 3 man team since ummm Tribe Called... (yes Frank... that was 4), umm? Elimidate? I don't know. Since. Ever.

Gotta run... but if you're interested in the hip hop scene in Toronto, there's a story in this week's NOW magazine that you may want to check out. I think I may blog about it later...

http://www.nowtoronto.com/music/story.cfm?content=162220

Shoutout to NOW magazine who listed me in the "Get your Hip Hop Fix" listing the clubs and promoters you need to know... Although I think there are far more deserving "hip hop promoters", I'll take the forward graciously... Actually, it was good, as they uncovered a link that I haven't used in years that I was forced to update - anybody seen Jef from Toronto-lime? I fear he may be at Jamaica's carnival...

Until next time...

Dance like no one's watching, sing like you're in your room with your brush, eat (but not more than you need), and try to be happy. Desiderata.

Yours sincerely,

Ian Andre Espinet (still Dre).

p.s. Check out my new blog at http://ianandreespinet.blogspot.com/

p.p.s. So it's evident Alicia Keys has a thing for Jamaicans like those guys from Roots Canada, the ill Nana (Fox Boogie Brown) and Lauryn Hill, but damn, what's up with all the frumpy reggae remixes? They sound like what I would imagine the "reggae" setting would be on a casio keyboard.

p.p.p.s. Boonks booonks... boooonks bunks.... (the sound we make when we think of reggae).

p.p.p.p.s. You know... like when you think of calypso, you go "ting ti ta ting ting"

p.p.p.p.p.s And when you think of hip hop, you want to cross your arms and do a beatbox like the fatboys...

p.p.p.p.p.p.s. It seems that Toronto guys are going on with some bi%cha$sness.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Click here, to learn about the affliction Diddy has commonly referred to as "bi%cha$sness". LMAO. Get your official no bi%cha$sness t-shirt here... http://www.seanjohn.com/shop/ Diddy is the greatest marketer of all time.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Damn Gina! My little manicurist (you're wrong... she's not Korean), scrapped up my backfoot so clean, that I nearly fell and buss my ish in the shower, and then again in the kitchen today. I guess I need a little sand paper for traction.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. I had to get it cleaned up... its just not hot when your footback pulls on the bed sheets... but it sure does come in handy when you need to scratch your other foot. Don't front. You know you do it.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Who in he!! greenlighted that Mariah Carey "Touch my body" song.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Do you love the Boondocks? Do you hate BET? If so, you need to see the banned Boondocks Season Season 02, Episode 14... Watch it here! Warning... this may be offensive to some.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Isn't it funny how when we stop to talk about our favorite songs from Soundtracks, and Soul Kitchen in general, someone always says "I did a dance to that song"? Laugh. You know it's true.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Isn't it even funnier how everyone has a "I was a dancer" story from their youth? We couldn't have ALL been dancers... Some of us kinda sucked. LOL.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Congrats to our home town heroes Jully Black and Russel Peters who will be holding down the Junos. I've never had a reason to watch before. That's the realest talk ever.

This Saturday. It's a Private Party Y'all.

If you haven't heard... I'm holding a private party this Saturday called the re:connect "meet market for 100 friends and 100 friends". As it is PRIVATE, you won't find word of it anywhere on facebook, myspace etc...

However, if you're a friend or acquaintance, like minded individual or kindred spirit... a frequent reader of my blog or email, or just a TRUE music lover who'd like to jam in an adult environment reserved to 200 heres how you get down.

Oh... before I forget to mention. The music ~ everything new that's good with a little old, classic house, old hip hop etc. This is NOT an old school or musically themed party. It's a house party. With music by the one and only JESTER and JASON CHAMBERS... So think "The One" ~ a fusion of all my events from Soul Kitchen to Kajmere and all points in between (Amnesia, B-Boy, Big People Fete, X-Factor & Icon) etc.

To get down... you know - you gotta get in. EMAIL: ian@amnesia.ca ~ DO NOT REPLY HERE OR YOU WON'T BE ADDED. This is an exclusive event and the price for exclusivity unfortunately is not free...but don't worry - you always get MORE than you pay for with me and trust me - the music alone - Jester and Attitude *(think back to when they nearly sunk the enterprise at Soul Kitchen boat cruise last summer) alone will be worth it.

I WILL RETURN ALL REQUESTS FOR ADMISSION BY FRIDAY LATEST... Please don't panic if I don't respond right away...

And you'll get the details when I respond. As I said. If I put it out, it's not private (and if you're on my friends list, I know you - or you're gonna be deleted soon lol - check: I've written something for EVERYONE on there).

re:connect ~ the "meet" market this Saturday

I

p.s. re:connect is a meeting of my friends and their friends... it's NOT just for single people, although if you're looking for someone, my friends are a good place to start lol.

p.p.s. Look out for:

Soul Kitchen ~ Soundtrack edition
next Friday March 28th at Blurr (214 Adelaide Street W) with Kid Kut and Jester...
(Event details: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=23593371416 )
$10 guestlist closes soon ~~~> email ian@amnesia.ca with "soul kitchen" in the re: line...)

Big People Fete ~ The long awaited return takes place next Saturday March 29th at The Great Iron Pot (55 Nugget in Scarb) with the Original Dr. Jay de Soca Prince and Stretch McNeilly
(Event details: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=8186199522 )

Amnesia ~ Friday May 2nd. It's been a long time. We shouldn't have left you.

p.p.p.s. I've joined the blackberry world... if you're a friend, send me your pin. Actually, while you're at it, if I've ever spoken to you on the phone, resend me your contact... I've lost most of mine that were in my last 2 phones and I'm generally updating and cleaning.

p.p.p.p.s. I'm bloggin now... All my randomness and thoughts that go deeper than my email. Check it out here. http://ianandreespinet.blogspot.com/

p.p.p.p.p.s. Since I didn't blog today, and I'm getting in the mood for re:connect and Soul Kitchen, here's my video of the day... The dance off from House Party ~ Ain't my type of hype babeeeee. I used to have the BIGGEST crush on Tisha Campbell. It must be the fore... umm seven head. It looks like mine. http://youtube.com/watch?v=UFSyBBglmpI
SWITCH.

p.p.p.p.p.p.s. You're not seeing the pants and slippery shoes that we used to dance in?!? I could watch youtube all day.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. I used to hate hearing I "look like Kid", but even more "redhead kingpin" and at the top of the list "yellowman". Kids are so silly.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Did ANYONE ever watch Class Act, House Party 2 or Funhouse? http://youtube.com/watch?v=7l4Nfg_zSyI

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. This is for Jester (the rap scene... http://youtube.com/watch?v=WXEsSrmabA0 ) ~ you're name is play... you just got played out.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. I always found Kid looked more like Dan-E-O anyway lol... http://youtube.com/watch?v=CgtiwAOliWE )

Bonus: (house party dance off in pajama jammy jam: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3fCzfnjITko

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Ain't gonna hurt nobody... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N3fIgf3TeiQ ~ I wish I could have a party in my house... but people just don't know how to keep a secret lol. This Saturday in the next best thing. Don't beat the furnace.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s.

Sigh... I hear my girl Lauren London is engaged to Lil Wayne. Guess the bad boy wins again. (Girl... gold teeth make his mouth smell... I'll be over here waiting). She's a little young for me anyway...

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Actually, all the 30 year old women I know have car seats for their men right now ~ I heard today that the 23 year old guys are doing all the things we're not doing. I've heard they have gaaaaaame... they're attentive (they ask with details about what ended up happening with the person you were conflicting with at work... they call every night, giving 3 rounds) etc...

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. How about? Working. Are they doing that? Hmmmph. After working 80 hours, I just want to spoon lol. 3 rounds? How about 1 time in the week and one Saturday every other week lol. And stop trying to kill a brother with all this "one hour sessions" talk.

p.p.p.pp.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Studies show (lol) that "The Average Guy" has sex 1.5 times a week (79 times a year), and lasts about 14 minutes.
He has a 1-in-4.3 chance of cheating on his wife and enjoys a total of 12.4 sex partners throughout his life.
The odds that his wife will cheat on him are 1 in 8.3, and the average woman enjoys a total of four sex partners throughout her life.
The Average Guy is 34.4 years old and earns about $36,100 a year.
He's about 5-feet-9 and weighs 175 pounds.
He's married with two children and has $3,100 in the bank.drinks at least 3.3 cups of coffee a day and 1.2 alcoholic drinks a day.
He eats fast food 1.4 times a week, visits a pizza joint three times a month, eats steak twice a week and eats 245 eggs a year.
The odds he'll have a heart attack are 1 in 21.
The odds that he'll develop heart disease before age 60 are 1 in 3 :edit: see a correlation?
The odds that he'll have high blood pressure are 1 in 4.
The odds that he'll develop prostate cancer are 1 in 6.
The odds that he'll develop diabetes are 1 in 12.

Those statistics come from the June issue of Men's Health magazine. 12.4 sex partners eh? I got to get my weight up lol... I'm well below the national averages lol. Now hiring for the positon of... jumpoff lol. Kidding. Seriously. Don't apply.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. You know what the thing is? I've been defending my "numbers". I'm not trying to give up a "number" to a girl if she's not gonna be around. Otherwise, I'm gonna have to do it a couple of times for no reason because now I wasted a number lol. You know what I'm talking about.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Don't judge me lol. At least I'm not like you girls and EXCLUDE the jumpoff that happened on vacation (if it's outside of the country it doesn't count), the ugly guy (that you conveniently forget until your girls pull you up on it), and your one one night stand from university or Club Epiphany (cause you were curious about whether roots men were really yardcore. nuff said)

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. What up KLC? I thought while we were bringing it back, I'd bring it back too. There's no money here - don't call me lol. (Call you this week).

See you on Saturday...

I

Losing my virginity. Again. Again.

After years of fighting the good fight, and after having to endure the heartbreak of knowing love and then breaking up, this past Saturday, I gave in and gave it up. Again.

The beautiful Nokia 6265 phone that Kim McKenzie was so gracious to send me the Christmas of 2006 as a birthday present from her company, died a sudden death on Friday asimiliar to the blue screen of Windows. It had been acting up from a couple weeks back when I dropped on the ice like a badly attached wig hitting the dance floor at Amnesia (and getting stomped on by an unsuspecting Tuffcat that thought it was a rat - but that's another story). {Whatup Pow?}

Editors Note: 1) Don't call Kim for a free phone - it was a promotional thing lol. 2) Kim if you're out there, I need help... all the numbers from the New York trip (Slick Rick, Biz Markie, Melle Mel etc) are in the phone, not to mention other irreplaceable texts and digits. I need help.

I had sworn that no other would ever replace my Motorola 2 way (P935) for after all, what communications device could really talk to it? It had everything I needed. It was instant (at the time 3 minutes a message WAS instant), it had snazzy one colour green text, lighted buttons (for messaging in the club or in bed), and then there were the dope FA-BO-LO-US like ringtones that you could produce yourself if you had a diploma from Trebas. Du dudu du du. And the key - and I have yet to see anything replicate it with such accuracy - bluetooth included - was the ability to BEEM your info. And it made this cute sound that sounded like a high pitched suck. Shu-uck. You could even walk by a girl in the club and just beem her. Just hit her in the hip with your info. And we got to walk around saying that - just 2 way me. Or just hit me on the hip. We were ubber cool. [I wonder if we'll look back on the 2 way like the brick phone?]

Anyway, on Saturday, I bought a Blackberry... the world phone edition to be exact. I can't lie - it's kinda dope. It has a pretty shiny face (like some girls at the club), it's Bluetooth so I can talk loud in the bank through an earpiece that doesn't really work (and really impress that 61 year old and scare small children who think I'm crazy), I can access Fassbook, and I can send people my pin (like msn for Blackberries) or my contact (though not as easily as the 2 way) and umm, it has a cool pong like game. Yeah.

I really don't know what it does that has people in such awe. Oh yeah. I can get your email on the road while I'm trying to navigate the DVP, while spooning (if only), or in the middle of my dream. Supposedly. I say supposedly, as this has yet to happen properly. I've gotten selected emails redirected from a particular email address (google addresses seem to be coming through), yet not others. As I get it configured, I'll be sure to tell you how that goes.

And it even has a notification for the sender so that they KNOW I opened their email or text at 4:14am ("I know you got it - I have a read receipt right here - 4:14am to be exact. Why didn't you get back to me?").

Stay tuned as I decide if being more accessible (if 2 numbers and 4 email addresses weren't enough) is more desireable...

I

p.s. Happy St. Patrick's Day... Video of the day:
House of Pain ~ Jump Around. Enjoy.

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZZADbubu0Y)

Losing my virginity... Again.

After years of fighting the good fight, and after having to endure the heartbreak of knowing love and then breaking up, this past Saturday, I gave in and gave it up. Again.

The beautiful Nokia 6265 phone that Kim McKenzie was so gracious to send me the Christmas of 2006 as a birthday present from her company, died a sudden death on Friday asimiliar to the blue screen of Windows. It had been acting up from a couple weeks back when I dropped on the ice like a badly attached wig hitting the dance floor at Amnesia (and getting stomped on by an unsuspecting Tuffcat that thought it was a rat - but that's another story). {Whatup Pow?}

Editors Note: 1) Don't call Kim for a free phone - it was a promotional thing lol. 2) Kim if you're out there, I need help... all the numbers from the New York trip (Slick Rick, Biz Markie, Melle Mel etc) are in the phone, not to mention other irreplaceable texts and digits. I need help.

I had sworn that no other would ever replace my Motorola 2 way (P935) for after all, what communications device could really talk to it? It had everything I needed. It was instant (at the time 3 minutes a message WAS instant), it had snazzy one colour green text, lighted buttons (for messaging in the club or in bed), and then there were the dope FA-BO-LO-US like ringtones that you could produce yourself if you had a diploma from Trebas. Du dudu du du. And the key - and I have yet to see anything replicate it with such accuracy - bluetooth included - was the ability to BEEM your info. And it made this cute sound that sounded like a high pitched suck. Shu-uck. You could even walk by a girl in the club and just beem her. Just hit her in the hip with your info. And we got to walk around saying that - just 2 way me. Or just hit me on the hip. We were ubber cool. [I wonder if we'll look back on the 2 way like the brick phone?]

Anyway, on Saturday, I bought a Blackberry... the world phone edition to be exact. I can't lie - it's kinda dope. It has a pretty shiny face (like some girls at the club), it's Bluetooth so I can talk loud in the bank through an earpiece that doesn't really work (and really impress that 61 year old and scare small children who think I'm crazy), I can access Fassbook, and I can send people my pin (like msn for Blackberries) or my contact (though not as easily as the 2 way) and umm, it has a cool pong like game. Yeah.

I really don't know what it does that has people in such awe. Oh yeah. I can get your email on the road while I'm trying to navigate the DVP, while spooning (if only), or in the middle of my dream. Supposedly. I say supposedly, as this has yet to happen properly. I've gotten selected emails redirected from a particular email address (google addresses seem to be coming through), yet not others. As I get it configured, I'll be sure to tell you how that goes.

And it even has a notification for the sender so that they KNOW I opened their email or text at 4:14am ("I know you got it - I have a read receipt right here - 4:14am to be exact. Why didn't you get back to me?").

Stay tuned as I decide if being more accessible (if 2 numbers and 4 email addresses weren't enough) is more desireable...

I

p.s. Happy St. Patrick's Day... Video of the day:
House of Pain ~ Jump Around. Enjoy.

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZZADbubu0Y)

p.s. Random Ian thoughts... from my March 13th email.

p.p.p.s. I was watching Keshia Cole the other day. I think she may personify all the reasons that I would never date an American girl.

p.p.p.p.s. Even though you can tell she's had a shower, like Trina and Trick Daddy, she just doesn't look CLEAN to me...

p.p.p.p.p.s. Did anyone else see Diddy in Raisin in the Sun (yes I know it was weeks ago). I think he did a great job though. Go Diddy.

p.p.p.p.p.p.s. I wonder if Jay-z's going to act?

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. By the way - stop asking me. I know I'm the ultimate Jay-z fan, but NO I'm not going to the concert. I need to see them up close or its not worth that kind of money to me. $300? For that much, he better come to the house and do some extra stuff like install my mom's dishwasher like ADT.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Wanna go to a free movie at the New AMC Yonge and Dundas? Click here and print it>>> Ian's the Best (say like that annoying DJ Khaled) :: A PDF version of the file is available HERE: http://www.amnesia.ca/amnesia_website/FLYERS/freemovie.pdf (this is the better link)

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. It's available Saturday March 22nd to Tuesday March 25th... I think I'm going on a hot date on Tuesday. First we'll eat KFC on the curb. (Nothin's too good for my date). Then off to something we don't want to see so we can neck in the back of the theatre... like Alien vs. Predator or something lol. Nothing like $2 Tuesdays. Hmmph. We're going dutch (as every Toronto girl CLAIMS we're cheap).


p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Neck. I don't think I've heard that term in 15 years... and the concept of making out (there's another one) in a movie theatre died with Cedarbrae at Markham and Lawrence... THE ORIGINAL CEDARBRAE. As in, where your feet stuck to the ground when you walked.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. As in "the black theatre" (the other one... not Town Centre). You knew too. You'd be in a movie like say Spiderman, and you'd hear "spot 'im Spidey". Some poor unsuspecting white person would say "could you please be quiet" and there'd be a roar of "Stchepts. But wait. She nah no seh me pay me good money fi see di movie. Bout quiet. Cha".

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Does anyone else remember when dating in Toronto was food and a movie (and maybe kissing in Warden Woods parking lot)? Now dating in Toronto, is a movie and sex. Shaking head. That sucks lol.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. If you're going to text me, PLEASE speak English. I feel like the mother in that commercial. I can't even understand what people are saying to me. Who understands this? afaik. bcnu. cwyl. hhok. oic. I have one... wtf?


p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. 1. As far as I know. 2. be seeing you. 3. chat with you later. 4. ha ha only kidding. 5. Oh. I see. Reaaal schtupid.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Go MJ. Michael Jackson has saved Neverland from auction. I'm personally glad - I bought a copy of the 25th anniversary album. It sucks. (Damn Will.I.Am and Fergie). But I still love MJ.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Back to the Toronto guys are cheap thing. I'm not cheap. But damnit man. I'll pay for everything. Forever. I have a simple rule. It goes like this. If you reach, I'll pay... but if you feel that it's your right, I'm not doing it - and it's not because romance is dead, but because some Toronto girls are trying to USE a man. My boy told me he went to dinner with a girl the other night. The girl ordered for herself - the most expensive thing on the menu - which she didn't eat mind you, because she had never had it before and didn't like it... then ordered something to go for her kid for lunch tomorrow. Are you crazy? HUMOUR ME. Pretend to fight so I can say that I'll be insulted. Don't be looking all around the room when the bill comes. And don't be ordering food you can't eat so you can send it in your kid's lunch tomorrow.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Or motion to throw some change for tip? Or parking or motion for gas money - or pretend you're gonna get out and pump. Something nah?

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. And don't be ordering something just because it's expensive and then realize what it is and play with it with your fork and waste it. And don't go on a date if you're in love with your ex cause you need company. If you don't want to date and you're lonely, get a cat.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. For the record... when you leave your house, you should have money. Leaving your house with less than $2 is called vagrancy... and there are too many Vagrant girls in this city... Getting caught between the door where they paid and the coat check that they don't have $2 for.

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. No. This didn't happen to me (recently) and no, I'm not bitter about anything lol. (I have vex money). I haven't been on a date in ages. I don't have the patience to learn anyone new. I just want them to KNOW me. Like it downloaded into their head like in the Matrix. LOL

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. I guess if you want to get ahead (stay up) in politics in the states, you can't be an Elliots Spitzer, you have to swallow. [google Elliot Spitzer then bill clinton lewinsky scandal - you'll get it]

p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.p.s. Just 1 more week til hibernation ends... re:connect guest list closes soon. Soul kitchen for the 28th too... :: ian@amnesia.ca for either. (by the way... you guys are so cute. When I say "re:line" I mean in the "RE" line, put which party you want.


See you next week. I'm back. I guess I feel better after cussing some people instead of holding it in.

By the way.. check out my boy Baba Kahn's album in stores everywhere out Tuesday March 18th...

In a rut...

What's up?

Anyone else in a rut? I've been in a mood for a hot minute. I've seldom left the house except for work unless it's been absolutely necessary, although I will have to today to fight the 3 - THREE - tickets that I got last week to the day. Almost $200. Sidebar: Does anyone know the rules on parking ticketing? I was driving off when he ran in FRONT of the car and THREW the ticket. It actually landed near the headlight... it didn't even stay on the car. I drove away, then thought about it and came back for it a few minutes later. Is that according to the rules? Can you ticket a moving car for a parking ticket? Hmmph. What a day it was. Earlier in the day, when the cop gave me a ticket for a right turn from Bay to Richmond, he smiled at my confused face and told me "don't worry - you obviously didn't see it... fight it and we'll work something out with the Crown". WTF?

I've had serious insomnia (and life issues) lately, and this morning, so this morning, I decided to try and clear out my numerous email accounts (especially my hotmail as it's become clogged with facebook notifications - holy #$%). I'm not sure why we have so many email addresses - it seems we just create more and more work for ourselves. Anyway, in the process of cleaning up, I came across a couple of unanswered emails and facebook messages. One, from just yesterday read:

Hello Ian,
We cross paths from time to time! You see so many people that you probably don't remember me. I just thought it important to congratulate you on what you do... I am a music addict myself and I feel that there is no better way to bring people of different backgrounds and ages together than with music!

Your events are always a success and I will keep on encouraging them for as long as I'm in Toronto at least!

On this note, keep on pushing (Sam Cooke)! lol! [next message: Correction: Curtis Mayfield not Sam Cooke!! lol!] ~ Emmanuella B

I just wanted to take a moment out to say THANK YOU. If you read my blogs, or even the long part of my email (that you're reading now), you'll see that their actually quite personal. I get a steady flow of love from people who write that "it's like I'm in their heads" or that "I'm going through the same things" or just to say thanks for the parties. Again, the frequently asked question is asked how I write them. The process is simple. For instance, as I listen to Jester playing on CIUT right now, I'm seated in front of the computer ("When las yu hear bout de congo man..."). Other times it's Jay-z. Or Common. Soca. Love songs. Reggae. Or silence. Whatever I feel I write. Obviously, I don't write everything that comes to mind, as you all might think I'm unstable and commit me like Britney (LOL). Sidebar: If you're trying to go for groceries and there are 300 paparatzi blocking your car and you run them over, who's the crazy one?

ACTUALLY, before I lose my point - it was this. Often I don't reply to these emails. I ALWAYS intend to... sometimes I flag them for response and don't get back to them. Other times they warrant and deserve more than a quick "thanks". Yet they get lost in my day and go unreturned. If you've ever taken the time to write me, please know that the moment you took to write makes me continue sharing my thoughts despite the fact that I wonder why anyone would care what I think. That was awkward, but you catch my drift.

This email (blog as it is) started as a note to a group of my close friends talking about the fact that in today's fast paced world, that I hadn't been the friend or son that I wanted to be. It was accidentally sent to my entire distribution list, and I got hundreds of responses saying that my words had inspired them to call friends, parents, loved ones and people they were in dispute with.

That day, I realized that a couple of things - including that we're all connected, and that my words could help others who feel the same as I do, feel less alone or inspire them as the lives and interactions that you all share with me do.

When I was in the shower this morning (the only place I don't take the phone), I was thinking about the fact (as I said in my blog) that we're at an age where we're grappling with EVERYTHING. Our friendships, materialism, religion, education, work, relationships. I find that I KNOW that I don't need a 42" LCD plasma but for some reason I lust it. I want a relationship, but I run from love or embrace my work as though the 2 are mutually exclusive and can't co-exist. I say things I don't mean. And don't say things that will make me vulnerable.

I make mistakes, and know better - and make the same mistakes over. I worry about what people will think. Then I tell myself that it doesn't matter what they think. Then I obsess over it. I say things like "I want to lose weight" but then break the routine of better eating, or exercise like 2 days in (no thanks to my friends {S.C waving double glazed donuts in front of me ~ good looking out Migs}. And I know better - and I know if it was life or death I'd do it. And my health IS life and death and I STILL don't do it. I love technology - and the fact that I've been able to come to know more personally thousands of people I've met in my journeys. And that 600 of them took a moment to wish me a happy bday. At the same time I hate the fact that my best friend sent me a Merry Christmas text. I would have preferred no greeting at all from him.

I had a really bad fight with someone I really care about. But I'm stubborn and don't want to phone. I'm upset by things people do like borrowing money and not bringing it back or sticking me with tickets for shows. But I don't cuss them. I just lock them off.

Anyway, this is getting long... and boring. My point was to thank each and everyone who's ever sent a smoke signal to let me know they're with me - in person in a party ("I'm so embarassed saying this and I know you probably get it all the time but..."), on the street, in the grocery, by email, facebook or anywhere else. Life's extremely hard - and beautiful all at the same time. I guess it's a beautiful struggle as Talib said. And sometimes it's seems like its harder to live than to die, but there's solace in knowing we're not alone (even though we may feel alone). We're all in this together.

There's lots of amazing parties coming up to help us free ourselves in the rhythms of music, but I don't really feel like expounding on them right now - you know what they are and why they're dope. If not, they're down below in the short section (and I left in last week's long).

I AM however, looking really forward to next Saturday's private re:connect "meet market" party. And Soul Kitchen (are you hearing the Toni's in the background? I'm still in House Party mode... anyone know where to get it on DVD? Mine's on video). And I'm really stoked for the return of the Big People Fete. I guess I'm happy that it's almost Spring (the 20th to be exact).

Politics and #%#$#!^...

Oh... interestingly enough, I got 14 emails from different people, I'm supposing picked up on my Political Science background, and wrote me to ask about the about the US presidential election. Here's the latest (on the Democratic side anyway). Obama or Clinton need 2,025 delegates to win. Thus far, of 44 contests (states), Obama has won 30 to Hillary's 14. He last won Mississippi (did you spell that fast as a kid?), and leads in both the number of delegates (1411 vs. 1250) and the popular vote ~ meaning that the number of PLACES he's won is higher and the number of PEOPLE that those places represent is also bigger. Say for example they competed in 3 places ~ 1 state has 20 people. He wins. Then the 2nd has 50 and she wins. They have 1 win each, but she has a larger percentage of the popular vote as the second place represents a bigger percentage of the populace).

Anyway, he's winning (according to someone in Hillary's camp (Ferraro who ran as the first female back in 84), "If Obama was a white man, he would not be in this position. And if he was a woman (of any color) he would not be in this position. He happens to be very lucky to be who he is. And the country is caught up in the concept". No comment. Here's how the map looks. The dark blue is Obama. The light blue is Clinton.

Here's the party long party info as last listed:

Anyway... There are only 1 more week until the return of my personal and private event - RE:CONNECT. The last time the combination of Jason Chambers and Jester were together was this past summer on the Soul Kitchen Boat Cruise and, like the culture, and like the music, it was a competitive event. Shot for shot - all night they had the crowd breathless. On the 22nd for my HOUSE PARTY, only 200 friends will be admitted. I'm writing my friends personally on facebook and email to invite you - but if I don't get to you before you get to me, PLEASE CONSIDER THIS YOUR INVITATION TO RE:CONNECT WITH ME. It's all about the TORONTO DEGREE OF SEPARATION. That's the good one - as in - you know everyone in the party and are happy to see them - not the bad one as in everyone he dated dated a girl you know from high school lol.

Then a mere week later is the Soul Kitchen event EVERYONE is talking about - The Soundtrack edition featuring the best and forgotten gems that were a PART of the movies that we used to watch - not just inspired by them... The artists seemed to have READ the scripts - placed themselves in the roles and written accordingly as opposed to just using a throwaway verse. On the 28th, the heat is on in the Kitchen. Get a plate. Click here for the commercial and get hyped >>> Soul Soundtracks...

Finally, after months and months away, its the return of the party that's MORE THAN JUST BACK IN TIMES. The Big People Fete. Big People meaning adults - but BIG as in pleasantly plump, rotund, and round are welcome too... It's a party that has the energy and vibes of the parties that we came up on - with the people that we know. No kids. No stchupidness. Just classic Dr Jay and a touch of Stretch McNeilly (de real ting).